I asked for chocolates when I should have asked for his time...
I don't know where I stand in his life anymore. Since the beginning of time, it has always been me who's trying so hard for this relationship. For more than 3 years, I've been the life of this relationship and he has been the life in me. I know that it's not right but I wanted to build my dreams around him. I wanted to plan my future with him because I thought he wanted the same. Well, I guess I thought wrong because all these years, he's been planning for himself alone...and I'm scared to admit that I was never a part of his plans.
And every single day that passes by, I'm beginning to understand why I'm always the last on his list. Everytime I think about it, I always get to the point where I have to conclude that I'm not important to him at all. Why do I always have to beg for his time? For little things that a person in love could think of without being reminded of? Why do I always have to plan in advance? Why does it always have to be me?..and why do I get the feeling that I'm never appreciated? Is it that hard? Is it that complicated? Is that too much to ask of him? Why does he always have to rub it in me that I'm not that important?
I just need him to need me. Is it that so bad?