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Cradling

Your tooth has fallen out — you survived your first scar and you seem wholesomely independent because now you don't cry when you see them leaving you at school... you have found a "buddy" whether imaginary or real that helps you blend in, adapt and carousel ride your way through the nascent ages of education-life.  Your umbilical chord may have been seperated but the belly-button shows that you are not unplugged. The placenta and the womb are now closer to you; still interconnected and interacting. From the first cry through the first word Allah Almighty has given you guardians to protect anfd love you.   You know the fights we have with the people who bear seem insignificant and rude when we either bear ourselves or bear witness their tribulations and tears in hoping that you are reared well, loved well, fed well and that you in turn can love well in devotion, patience and a hearty magnitude. That pressure is tremendous and increases with your wreight, size and vocabulary.  Each new body language may trigger it:   

  • You learn to walk — they hope you don't fall
  • You learn to read — they want to see if you read well
  • You learn about signs — they want you to learn the right ones.
  • You learn about your health — they'll pull even a procrastinator like you.

   I am a lazy cough-potato. Each new day is a great adventure of rolling around in my computer chair and clinking away at the same pages I clicked on the day before. Each new feat of staying on the computer is like a grand prize in itself. And each moment I'm not physically active I'm drawing a plethora of medical disasters my way.   My parents advised exercise and diet. I made fake promises. I did nothing.   THey pushed. I reclined.  They pushed. I whined.  They pushed. I denied.  They pushed. I resigned.   To my life of my couch potato perfection.  My parents did not surrender. Did not give in. I was irked. Their towels weren't thrown. I felt I should do whatever.  Immaturity should be fined.  The doctor told me that if I did not lose weight, eat healthy and exercise I might get my family's heart related diseases and more. They told me whaT I can eat and not. I told him, " This is a bit of a shock to me Doctor."  Believe me. It was.  And all the time my Mom was supporting me with "Don't feel bad" statements.  After a while, when I got home, and I told Dad everything — I cried.  I cried holding my Ma and she held me back.  I asked her — can you just stay with me a bit as I lie down? I was afraid. I didn't know what to think.  My Ma hugged me as I cried and she cried too with my Dad staying close. He had tried to cheer me up too.Hoping I would smile he made me talk to cerrain people and told me to have strength.  First day at school — First scar survived — First buddy — a lot of firsts there  But To Abbu and Ammu they may not be the same "Firsts" that we see. Even in birth they served as placenta and womb. Now they do the same. They do not create chronologies or composes scenes.  To them I'm still their child.  Never counting I'm twenty-three...