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Will Durst's Blog

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Feb.01.2013
(First published today at Huffington Post Comedy.) Hey! You! Yes, you. Sorry. Just trying to get your attention to impart an important warning here. For the next couple weeks, it's imperative all you good folks out there stay alert and keep your wits about you. Remove the earbuds, no texting...
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Nov.09.2012
Holey moley catfish. Well, thank god that's finally over. Further thanks that the climax was quick and clean. Almost surgical. Not as long a night as many first thought it might be. Except for Karl Rove that is, who for all we know is still scribbling numbers to prove the call on Clinton's...
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Sep.12.2012
Elect to Laugh.jpg
Yes, there’s an exclamation point in the title of my new eBook. Because it’s that good. Been scrambling to get this thing published before the November presidential election, and somehow, it went and got did. The process almost killed me. So celebrate life by buying it. Please. It’s called Elect to...
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Aug.19.2012
With the election slipping away like a handful of mercury on a turbocharged merry-go-round, Mitt Romney managed to change the conversation from unreleased tax returns and foreign misadventures by plucking Paul Ryan out of the Wisconsin wilds to be his running mate. "Romney-Ryan." Short,...
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Mar.12.2012
And now your eagerly awaited Super Tuesday Report. Named for the quantity of contests and not the quality of participants. Perhaps it would be more apt to say Not So Super Tuesday Report. More of a Frenetic and Confusing but Ultimately Unsatisfying with a Slight Aftertaste of Desperation...
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Mar.05.2012
Odd week for Mitt Romney. The roller coaster candidate was on the receiving end of more mixed messages than a basement bulletin board at the United Nations on Take Your Schizophrenic to Work Day. While cruising to an easy victory in the Arizona primary he barely eked out a squeaker in Michigan...
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Feb.25.2012
Once again, the wacky wheel of destiny takes a mighty spin and the big red pointer lands smack on the name of the next Great White Republican Hope -- Rick Santorum. The seventh or eighth candidate to vault into the lead of the GOP sweepstakes primarily because he is not Mitt Romney. A similar...
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Feb.19.2012
Don't mean to overreact and risk boosting everybody's blood pressure higher than opening offers on Facebook's upcoming IPO, but this might be a halfway decent time to seek out a nice safe steel bunker to hunker down in or behind, because it's awards season and heavy metal statuettes are being...
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Feb.13.2012
There's something about Mitt. And whatever it is, a few folks are definitely allergic. Maybe they sense he has the same connection to humanity that a drive shaft has to bouillabaisse. Could be he's worth more than most small Balkan nations. Might be the Mormon thing or perhaps he just smells...
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Jan.27.2012
As rare and mythical as the unicorn, it too cavorts amongst the clouds with double rainbows birthing from its unfathomable depths. But instead of worshipful 12 year- old girls, it is conservative politicians who tack drawings of this inamorata on walls above their beds. We're talking about the...
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Jan.02.2012
Q. A little help here. Exactly what are the Iowa Caucuses? A. The Iowa Caucuses is a method of choosing a presidential nominee. Held every four years. Usually in Iowa. Q. Why is it so important? A. Number one in the batting order. Opening stanza of an epic poem. The recorded preamble to the...
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Dec.23.2011
Bah humbug everybody. And I imagine that sentiment is being echoed by more than a few of you overly familiar with the soft dark underbelly of this "happiest time of the year." Those of us who have been washed prone by the gushing holiday faucet of red and green greed and are dreading the...
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Dec.16.2011
The mad mud tossing between Newt Gingrich and Mitt Romney, the last two Republicans still standing, is quickly ramping up to levels not seen since the Agincourt catapults. The candidates and their surrogates are busy dredging up dirt with fleets of front loaders, personally wetting it down with...
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Dec.09.2011
Okay. You can stop vibrating like a shaved poodle duct-taped to the foul pole at Wrigley during a night game in April. It's finally here. The 8th annual Top Ten Comedic News Stories of the Year. Veterans, please advise the newbies this list is NOT to be confused with the Top Ten Legitimate News...
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Dec.03.2011
Let's take a peek behind the scenes of GOP headquarters to listen in on the coaching strategy for the little game Republicans are currently playing called, "Anybody but Romney." Think "Whack- A- Mole" with media mallets. "Well, here it is, boys, 2011. About time we scour the country and figure...
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