Q. Can you please explain what the heck is going on in Rome?
A. Well, Pope Benedict XVI retired and now Catholic Cardinals from around the world are congregating to elect a new one.
Q. When was the last time a pope retired?
Q. No, before that.
A. July 4, 1415. Gregory XII stepped down to head off on a hot weekend with his brother- in- law's sister's seamstress' pool boy in Sardinia.
A. Rumor has it.
Q. Which makes Benedict the first man in 600 years able to say he used to be pope?
A. Don't care who you are, that's always got to be the cherry on top your resume.
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