When I grow up I want to be? This question now has become a family joke. I still laugh about it when I think of what I really wanted to be when I grew up.
Well I wanted to be an Assassin or a Fire Fighter. True be told, this is what I wanted to be. The Fire Fighter was out for the same reason I could not join the army. Flat Foot, Cross Eyed and bow legged. The assassin was my fantasy life. I would get all the people that harmed me when I was grown up from family to the man that raped me. Then my next targets would be the pedophiles, molesters, rapist and those who lied their way through life that brought harm to others.
Now when I think of what I want to be when I grow up, I have become. A person of honesty, trust, a person that loves everyone. I have forgiven the people that took my life as it was. I have become the writer I wanted to be, the friend the people wanted. Even though people have judged me by their own standards and can't see pass the lies they have told about me, I still love them and will help them when they need it.
I am a person that does not judge, nor put down someone. I become a person that does not lie even if I harm myself with the truth. I protect my family, my children, my grandchildren.
I am proud of whom I have become. I may not have the riches of material possessions, but I have love, the belief that all people have the right to a second chance. I have a heart that could make the wrong right.
I walk through this life with my chin in the air and a smile on my face. Even though I know what people have said about me, I have never retaliated against any of these people. I live by my grandmother (Nanny's) and Dad (Yves's)words. The way they would tell stories to us when we were children, I heed their council all my life.
So when I grow up I want all the things people have taken from me, if I never get it, I am happy with the person I am. For any one that calls me a friend, mom, grandmother, aunt, niece, cousin, wife, partner, Wende, Duckie, Billy-Joe, I will be there for them always, and protect them.
I know my Nanny and Dad are proud of me, for I live by their teachings. Treat others the way you want to be treated. If you want something in this world work for it. The world does not owe you anything, you owe the world. Help others when they are in need, for one day you may need their help. Never lie for it only makes you low. Love like it was your last day, live like it was last day. But most of all be proud of who you are, because if you can't be proud of yourself, no one else can be.
So when I grow up, I want to be exactly whom my Dad and Nanny expected me to be. ME
Causes Wende Plante aka Billy-Joe Supports
Distress Centre Of Ontario, Aids Committee of Durham Region, United Survivors, Y.W.C.A.