I was introduced to the mysterious allure of women by my big sister. OK, so I was spying on her. She and her girlfriends, after poring over teen magazines in the backyard, swapped beauty tips. "If you see a boy you like and you don't have any Lip Smacker handy," said one girl, "bite your lips and pinch your cheeks. That's how come Justin fell in love with me. I bit my lips until they bled!"

When I heard this I laughed. I'd like to say it was because I was sensible and well-grounded, but, really, it was because I was only 11. Beauty secrets, and other facts of life yet to be revealed, struck me as goofy. A few years later, I was scouring the cosmetic aisle at the drug store for candy-colored lip gloss while my big sister and her friends had moved on to enticing the opposite sex by darkening their eyelashes with black goop.

The point is, makeup is mysterious and it's nice to have a older and wiser sister around.

And if she's not within spying distance? Well, watch that mascara wand!