People! People! I have some great news!
Scientists - you know those nerdy girls and boys from high school who went on to spend 8 to 12 more years studying? (Geesh, why would anyone want to do that?)
Anyway, they have been caught in a scandal someone lacking originality labeled - Satelllitegate.
Fortunately for us, Editor has all the answers. A lot of those people that like to ridicule scientists don't have the answers, so listen up . . . because someone has to have the answers and just because someone is an expert and has dedicated their life to studying a phenomena - Pfffft! - they don't necessarily know anything.
Listen to what Editor wrote, "US Government admits global warming satellite sensors "degraded" - temperatures may be out by 10-15 degrees. Now five satellites in controversy. Top scientists speak out."
Hey, thank goodness they figured out something any 1o year old could tell you, scientific instruments degrade over time (even in outer space) and (so we assume) the degradation must be taken account when studying the temperature data.
But, where is the solution given? I can't find it now. Where will the money come from so the instrumentation can be kept upgraded? When will this be done? (And by the way, will NASA channel show the film of the repairs?)
Thank goodness, Editor told us about this!
Because these last three weeks I thought Russia had been covered by wildfires and one third of Pakistan had been flooded and landslides were still suffocating people in China and Mongolia has so little water the people there had to migrate and the tundra has been thawing and glaciers have melted, Tuvalu will soon be an underwater tourist attraction and water was causing huge tensions between neighbors due to lack of water and that people were starving because of drought, floods and disease.
Thank goodness we know that instead of 145 degrees Fahrenheit in Russia (like the media wants us to believe) probably the temperature has only been 130 degrees Fahrenheit.
By the devil, why are those Russians crying about fires anyway. Stuff happens. Get a new house. Bury the ashes from that spot where you think your Dad was burned to death.
Hey, carbon dioxide has nothing to do with global warming so who cares about those floods and wildfires. Tell those people "Suck it up. Quit whining!"
And look at these "facts." Pfffft! So these may be true statements but they are not facts that tell us anything about global warming.
"* According to the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, the planet has just come through the warmest decade, the warmest 12 months, the warmest six months, and the warmest April, May, and June on record.
* A "staggering" new study from Canadian researchers has shown that warmer seawater has reduced phytoplankton, the base of the marine food chain, by 40% since 1950.
* Nine nations have so far set their all-time temperature records in 2010, including Russia (111 degrees), Niger (118), Sudan (121), Saudi Arabia and Iraq (126 apiece), and Pakistan, which also set the new all-time Asia record in May: a hair under 130 degrees. I can turn my oven to 130 degrees,"
written by some attention hog named Bill McKibben at 350.org.
Hey, carbon dioxide and global warming, "So what!" to you and your floods and wildfires and smoke pollution.
"Oh no, I can't breathe, ash particles are flying up my nose." "Oh no, I can't see the road; is thick smoke is everywhere."