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Restrooms are private, even in public.

I was at Starbucks this morning and as I went to the bathroom, a woman was leaving.  She held the door open and waited for me to enter.  It was a full door hold.  I was polite and said, "Thank you," but it felt super strange.

Why are you holding the door open to the point that I sort of need to duck past your arm?  It was weird and I felt like there was this awkward pause, maybe even a little bit of eye contact, where I sort of wondered if she was going to leave.  I don't know you.

I'm sure the woman was just being nice, but checking that the seat isn't wet as you're leaving is good enough for me.  Just walk out of the bathroom, let the door go and then it's my turn.

I'm not sure why this bothered me today.  Could be it's Monday, but more likely it's that I need my space.  I know that's a typical American trait, but I can't help it.

Bathrooms are places where we have our pants down and I'm simply asking to be there on my own, in private.  I don't want to think about what the person before me was doing and bathroom door exchange is not a game I like to play.

Don't get me wrong, once I'm in the restroom I can do what needs to be done.  I'm not one of those people that can't…produce in a public restroom.  That must be awful.  I do, however, need to clear my mind and sometimes the lingering smell of the person before me, or the noises in the stall next to me are about all I can take.

Quick word about the noises.  People should really learn to use the flusher for that sort of thing.

I could probably go on for several posts about restrooms.  Wouldn't that be a treat?

The point is…wait, what was the point?

Oh yeah, I like a direct restroom approach, without contact.  There it is.  I learned that about myself today.

One more thing, if there are multiple stalls, please don't talk to me while we are going potty, that's just weird too.

My thoughts from the laundry room.  Pee Before Bed.


9 Comment count
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Amen. Love this post, Tracy, 


Love this post, Tracy,  just love it.

Thanks! :-)


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Thank you!!

Thank you!!

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Overly kind...

Sometimes people who are too overly polite are annoying.  I understand why you were bothered.  

I appreciate it when management puts the waste can for paper towels by the door--so I can use the towel to open the door before I discard it.  Researchers say too many folk do not wash their hands when they leave and touch that door.  (And driers spread bacteria through the air, so paper towels are better--if folks don't throw them on the floor.)

I am often confused about using flush handle or turning on faucet iin public rest rooms.  Some are automatic and some are not.  Can't always guess which are which.  

Thanks for your ideas on rest room etiquette.


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Overly polite...that's

Overly polite...that's exactly what it is.  I love you called it "restroom ettiquette."  That sounds so civilized.  Thank you for reading, Sue.  It's nice to know I'm not the only one with bathroom angst.  

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Loved this post.  I hate

Loved this post. 

I hate having someone try to talk to me when I'm in a stall. I walk in and I want to make as little contact as possible with others, even people I know. Can't I pee in peace? Is that too much to ask?

Wait. I have three kids and a cat. I get no peace at home either.


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Thank you!!

I could not agree more.  Just a few minutes of peace is all we're asking for here.  I too have three children.  Sometimes I hide in the bathroom.  Hahahaha.  Thanks for reading and your comments.

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Tracy,     Loved this piece. 


    Loved this piece.  Made me laugh, and yet pondering it, I find that there are so many nuances to it. 

A few minutes peace?  You'd think that would be a no-brainer.  Yet, even the cat feels she has the right to intrude.  But don't intrude on her. She needs time alone to do her 'business'.  ~nan

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the door

It's possible she was only trying to help you get in faster because she thought you were stalling.


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So many abrasive or irritating actions and speeches are excused with the remark, "well, after all, he/she meant well." Or, "he/she was only trying to help." We're just fortunate that it isn't worse. There are 7billion skulls in this world and they all contain different ideas and beliefs. Don't get me started on men's rest rooms. (I've heard women's are worse, but I don't believe it.) One example: Why will a man walk past a trash barrel that almost jumps out and trips him to throw chewing gum, wrappers, cigarette butts, rolled up paper towels or anything he can find into a urinal? That's one example but I could use up several blog sites with the rest and not cover it. -------- Charlie