What do I feel like? Exhausted. My heart is pounding too hard. I ate a hard-boiled egg for breakfast, a string cheese, most of an apple. Got a decaf soy mocha before drive to Dr. Roman. Had directions, giant accident on second to last street I needed to turn on. I rerouted myself, although I felt mostly out of it. Had appt. Got Jake on phone, everyone else didn’t bother to answer, save for Will who was in a movie. Jake and I talked until I got from Glendale to Hollywood location. Hung up. I parked in a free spot. Walked. Linda came. We had lunch. I had the salt and pepper chicken, spinach salad with hazel nuts and bit of goat cheese, lemon vinaigrette, the mashed potato lump. I got a Mexican coke with the real sugar, so they say, and I intended to split the tasty little orange-chocolate ganache. Linda didn’t want any. It was too darned good to save and take home. I at the whole brownie sized ganache. It was chewy, had coconut in it. Just delicious. Too much sugar. I don’t know. It was hard to push through this morning. I was ready to lounge around. Stupid people ask me if I am ready to go back to work. I told them I told my employer I would, and we’ve reduced slightly my work load. I’ll have a two hour break inbetween my academic classes now, we finally got rid of that nasty computer babysitting where they didn’t give me books or help for every grade under their sun. And I put my tutoring work on hold. It is beautiful out. Maybe we’ll go walk and I will wake up. This condition, whatever you wish it to be, is simply exhausting. Sure. My schedule was, and the family/ mom stress didn’t help. Neither did not having a vacation really til spring. Neither did the high fever for so many days in a row, stupid flu. But how many days then do you sleep all day with a fever of 102-103? Last two days of flu after 6 days of that high fever were 100 two days in a row. Last day of that I went to the teacher conference I had spent $60 dollars out of pocket on. Got some stuff. But was so, so, so exhausted. Didn’t stay for whole thing. Just pushed right through. How many days do we give in to exhaustion? Never felt completely unexhausted. Pushed through with a few activities from flu to spring break. Went to Palm Springs still snippy and exhausted, and then head troubles began. And so it goes.