HEAVENLY SEX

1. The Law

Opens a bottle of schnapps. “Writer, schmyter,

you’re unemployed.

Unemployed people must make love

at least once a day.

Talmud says:

            A laborer, twice a week; a mule driver

once a week; a camel driver,

once a month. It’s the law.

This is heavenly sex. Say a blessing—

pray— ‘Blessed art thou, O Lord our God…’

Ba-ruch a-ta Adonai, El-lo-hei-nu…

For your spouse and for your seed.

What is it with you?

I need to explain how to bring a soul into the world?”

2. The Blessing

“Listen:

The soul is the Lord’s candle.

So you say a blessing. And you sing to her—your wife:

Strength and honor are her clothing, you sing.

She openeth her mouth with wisdom, you sing.

Her children arise up and call her blessed, you sing.

Rabbi says if knowing a woman were not holy,

            it would not be called ‘knowing.’

So, after a good Shabbes meal—

            linen tablecloth, blessed spices,

braided loaves of challah,

a goblet of wine…

Thirty-nine things you cannot do on the Sabbath,

but you can eat. You can drink. You can schtepp.

Make one another happy.

It’s the law.”