As I was running this early morning at the oval track I had a light bulb moment.
Attainable goals are essential in life. In my situation where upsets were unforeseen I see now how valuable having goals are to getting myself out of disappointment and anger.
When I was busy traveling for work, I had not time for fitness. I thought a lot about wellbeing but I was preoccupied with other things.
When I lost my job I became angry. I felt disoriented with lots of spare time on my hands.
I decided to start running and exercise partly for fitness but mainly to try to keep myself occupied and to help myself from falling apart.
For a while I was stuck able to complete only 2 rounds at the oval track. But I kept on running. I joined a race and I never gave up on trying to run farther in distance.
Meanwhile, a part-time offer landed on my lap and I took it still feeling down and inadequate. But I hung in there talking myself into believing that something good would happen.
By then, I was able to increase my running pace and make it to sometimes 5 rounds and other times 4 rounds on the oval track. I had good days and bad days but giving up was never an option.
Eventually, I decided to go back to studying. Now my hands are full with counseling class and sign language class. I appreciate the part-time work because it allows me to go to school.
When I run, I feel much more hopeful imagining that I see results at the finish line. My distance increased to 7 rounds. I finally left behind the anger in the 6th round and never looked back.
This morning, I pushed myself one step further and ran my 8th lap! I have goals to achieve. I want to complete my courses with flying colors. I want to graduate with my certificates on hand.
Having a goal or two reinforces one’s coping abilities. I thought about this while running this morning and I just needed to say it out loud, for myself to hear and to acknowledge.
With my aching knees I did not think the 8th lap was attainable. Now my knees no longer ache. I just have to pace myself and not allow unforeseen upsets to crush my desire to reach my goals.