I was yearning for a year off so when the offer arrived I made up my mind even before the formal announcement. It was a big and exciting challenge to take on. But it required that I leave a very comfortable job of 9 years, my home away from home, and a familiar place that brought me fulfillment, love, security and contentment. I chose to move away and leave my girls behind, coming home to see them only on weekends. I let go of the only life I knew, being close to family with the desire to try something new. I gave up everything that stayed close and loyal to me in exchange for a challenge I thought I could handle. The move was easy and home visits on weekends were a breeze. The life was good both ways that made coming and going here and there actually nice.
One day a few months down the road all hell broke lose. Skeletons and monsters came flying out from all directions landing on my table. Everything I lived for and believed in turned into a threat and holding on became a challenge. Sleep became a struggle and ultimately, staying true to myself stumped me. I let go of a good life for this? Was I going to give up my self-worth for this?
I returned home a year later to the birth life I knew and my loved ones welcomed me back with open arms. A look back at that year neither here nor there made me realize that either way something had to give or I had to let go. I could not get into it, so I chose to get out of it in order to keep my innermost authentic self intact.