Still singing the first world blues and comforting myself, looking for answer amongst the grains of sand. I turned to writing to help me.
Not unusual. I write to create, explore myself, think and vent about the world and my life. I write to express. But this writing is a little different. This is power writing.
I began doing this years ago but quit doing it years ago. I date the entries so I know my last one was in June of 2000.
That day of power writing came on the host of many changes. We'd bought our house the year before. My mother came out to visit us, the only time she's visited my wife and me in our natural habitat. She'd left the week before. I was due to start a new job. I've not left there since then, as another company consumed it and my current company bought that one. It's the corporate food chain.
So things were going well. Into that flowed darkness. My beautiful black friend, Sammy, a long haired cat, died unexpectedly. It devastated me, as death tends to do. He was a rescue, smart and personable. I turned to power writing that day to help me cope. It's essentially a wish list of what I want for myself. Money, cars, houses and the like aren't on this list. This list is about joy, happiness and health. As it happens, it's mostly about others' health and happiness. I figured out that if they're healthier and happier then I'm healthier and happier, remaining true to my selfish self.
The key to the exercise is to first purge my mind and then write like mad. I like being alone for it and in a quiet space. Typically, like today, I work myself up to the moment by walking around and thinking, then sitting down and meditating. Then some chord is struck and my nerves and mind respond, Engage!
I have a black notebook just for this purpose and use a purple magic marker. I happen to like purple. This being a brainstorming session, I just let fly the script, putting thoughts and hopes into solid words for the universe to take into account and act upon.
I don't know if this works but I've had success with it it. Clearly, right, or I wouldn't be doing it again unless I was desperate or crazy.
I'm neither at the moment. Give me a little time and that will change. Of course, I'm the judge of my emotional state and my close personal relationship with the patient may influence my judgement. Meanwhile, I've put it out to the world, please take care of my friends and family. Let them be healthy, happy and safe.
This may not work for others. Others will write me off as lunatic inclined. That's fine as this is not being done for their benefit. This works for me.
Let everyone else do what they need to do. Peace and love, brothers and sisters. Michael out.
Causes Michael Seidel Supports
Kiva, Women's International League for Peace and Freedom, Propublica.org, Doctors Without Borders, GreaterGood.com