Today's writing day went well but felt too short. I resolved some problems I had with the beginning of a chapter. I was anxious over it, had been coaching myself through the day and night to deal with it.
Yesterday's writing day was way too short, with writing time wedged into the start of the day. My wife had a birthday this week so we were going to brunch to celebrate. She has a list of restaurants -- she lives by lists, by the way. Every day begins and ends with lists.
She has a list of restaurants that we 'must try' as we've lived here several years and have yet to visit them. I pointed out that we've looked at their menus and their menus don't appeal to me but she insists we should try them so we can rule them out as places we want to eat.
Her logic is sometimes elusive. We'd been giving Scheckter sub cut fluids every day. Then she proposed, "Let's not do it today." After five days of providing him fluids and having good results, I was comfortable with that. He rewarded me by drinking from my hand from the sink faucet, as he enjoyed doing in the years before he became sick.
I showed my wife. "Maybe we should give him fluids," she said.
"Why? He's drinking normally. He hasn't been drinking like this for the last two weeks."
"I don't want him to be dehydrated."
"But he's drinking now." I thought a moment more. "Would you have proposed this if I hadn't showed you that he was drinking his water like he used to?"
"Don't wrap me up in my thinking."
The restaurant was heavy on meat, fried food and sauces. The clientele present startled me. Large girth was the norm. Perhaps cruelly and unfairly, I thought it made sense that this restaurant, heavy with creams and meats, has the largest collection of overweight people I've ever seen in one place in Ashland.
My meal was okay. It didn't wow me but we could check that restaurant off our list.
We walked around town after our brunch. Returning home, I read a Lisa Lutz Spellman novel. I felt her humor and characters were an appropriate counter-balance to my darkness. Meanwhile, I tended Scheckter, feeding him, feeding him, ensuring he was drinking, watching him pee. Once the temp dropped into the high 80s and he yard was shadowed by trees and mountain, I did my yard work. My wife had another RA flair, diminishing her energy. Neither of us slept well. Now --
Back to work. A few team members are out - vacation and illness - so they lean more heavily on me. "Can you do this? Can you help with that?"
My nature betrays me. Yes, of course, I will help. That's how I am, desperate to be liked and appreciated.
At least the writing day went well this morning, with almost ninety minutes of writing and editing like crazy.
Time to return to the real world.
Causes Michael Seidel Supports
Kiva, Women's International League for Peace and Freedom, Propublica.org, Doctors Without Borders, GreaterGood.com