WARNING: This is another work post.  

Sorry that there are so many.

My posts are often thinly thought out, just a stream that squirts out. Then I think more on what I thought I was saying and discovered that I'm still boring down through an onion's layer. Wonder if there's anything at the middle? (Is it like a Tootsie Pop with a chewy center nugget?) So thinking of that, I wonder if maybe I'm boring up from the middle. The layers have been added, wrapping, insulating and forming me. I need to break out of them.

All this goes back to work and balance. I've added attitude to that short list. Really must segregate work and realize, it is not me. I shouldn't take pleasure nor pain from it. It's just business. Their impressions of me are narrow-scoped and shallow. Really, their impressions of me are, do I help the company save money and make more money? 

Should their ignorance about what I do and how I do it affect my compass about who I am and what I want? 

Of course not. I'm socialized and conditioned to be this animal. Fortunately I can think about it and decide that's not the animal that I am. 

Easily written, isn't it? Much harder to grasp and enforce. 

We always talk about work/life balance in our company. I think the most critical part of that is the aspect never mentioned, that work should be compartmentalized, stuck in a drawer of hours that I open each morning and close at the end of the work day. 

There were many other aspects associated with this. Much of my ruminations were about attitude, what creates attitude and cognitive dissonance and self-perception. They, being management, would probably counsel me to change my attitude, to be more positive. That supposes that the work I do and the attitude associated with it is in a vacuum. In a sense I do and I don't. I work alone at home, rarely hearing my team mates' voices. Most business is done through email and chat but I do so because of the environment and relationships they foster and condone. 

As far as being a team, if we're a team, we play a sport in a season without end or beginning. We never celebrate victories, for we're not sales. Only those who face clients are authorized to celebrate a sale. There is no money for the rest of us to waste on celebrating, team! There are no innings, quarters, periods, laps, or distance. If we're a team, we're mice on a treadmill, forever running for a treat proferred just out of reach. 

There is no beginning nor end, just the endless running in place.