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Teenage Tears

Crossing into a new place with your child is a wonderful thing. It only takes something small for it to occur. You could be driving along the usual suburban streets, the mass of grey and brown sidewalks, the condensation on the glass, the mundane existence you believe to have found yourself lost and drowning in, the lack of sunlight, the demise of manners and out of the blue Jackson Brown comes on the ipod and you drive along not noticing anything in particular and then you turn and see that your son is crying and  it stuns you out of your complacency and you touch his leg in a gesture of love and the first thing you notice is that its as hard as steel and then its not easy because there is all the confusion that comes out of young mouths like lost love and the finality of saying goodbye to someone you loved and his tears are big and they fall  like giant  shiny drops down his cheek and I am still driving and then I am crying too and I don't know why but I do know that half of me is crying with joy that he can cry and  that he relates to Jackson Brown and half of me is crying because I know that life is half tears if you're lucky and half laughter and when you are seventeen sometimes tears are the only way out and I love this moment, I love Jackson Brown and I love our companionship and I love the way my son can cry openly in front of me and I tell him so - I tell him how lucky he is  to be able to cry - I tell him that crying is essential and strong and that all will reveal itself in time and then  he gets out of the car and runs toward the rugby pitch like a young svelte  deer in a dark wood  searching for the light and I watch him fly away from me like a bright light into a new  day and then I drive onward into the unknown with hands still wet with warm tears - a mix of honey and silk on my fingertips.

Comments
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Mary, once again, what a moving piece

What a special moment shared with your son...and the fact that he was willing to share his tears with you, awesome!

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Realization

A very clear moment when the change that had been happening slowly now crystalized into reality you could not ignore or overlook. When does a boy become a man? Who really knows, but, just like night becoming day, there is a realization that it has happened and there is no denying it; it must be acknowledged.

You are lucky to have taken part in such a trust and he is lucky you gave it plenty of respect and love.

Cheers,
Christine

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Mares, your words leave me

Mares, your words leave me breathless.
J

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When does a boy become a man?

Thank you Nancy, Christine and Jodi for taking the time to respond to my pondering ways.......................these moments are so fleeting that if I don't take a snapshot they are gone forever and maybe someday they will recur with more worth than they were considered. best always dear writer friends. m