No, I am not going to turn this blog into a celebration of the Saints and their various Feast Days, but I still need to just say this one thing: Today is the Feast Day of Blessed Agnello of Pisa. He was of the Franciscan Order and was admitted into the Order by St. Francis of Assisi himself -- so, naturally, since St. Francis is one of my very favorite Saints, that caught my eye and I eagerly read all about Blessed Agnello of Pisa.
This was the part I loved best: Blessed Agnello's "zeal for poverty". Wow, a man after my own heart!! I certainly have learned how to have a zeal for poverty, God knows.
To be honest, though, I do find the premise of true Christian poverty remarkable and, as I have studied it more, I find it really comforting. Of course, there is a HUGE difference in the type of poverty St. Francis and St. Clare adhered to, and the kind I have lived with for the last few years. Theirs concerned making vows that their lives would be entirely in the Lord's keeping and so they didn't need to own anything. Whereas, mine has come from trying to maintain a house I can't afford, while simultaneously loving the house and being wholly unwilling to sell it. Sort of, "holy" poverty vs. "wholly" impoverished.
For those of you who are not-so-loyal readers of this lofty blog (oh, let's put a better spin on that and call you "the newly arrived to this lofty blog"), the Universe came up with an ingenious plan to take care of my poverty problem once and for all: If you can't afford it and yet you won't sell it, we'll simply return it to the proverbial Dust whence it came. Yes. The city is re-zoning my street for commercial use and will be demolishing the house I love. Problem solved. And, as these things go, they're giving me adequate compensation for taking my house, my yard, my many trees and flowers, out from under me.
Even while this whole scenario breaks my heart, I am finally able to get some rest at night -- for the first time in many years, to be honest.
And that's where this whole "vow of poverty" idea becomes really attractive to me. No, I don't want to not own anything. I am just so looking forward to the peace of mind that comes from not owing anything. I barely remember what that feels like, gang. But it is on its way to me.
On another topic... This pertains to the subject heading of this post today. [I will give you a moment to scroll back up and read it.] One of my client's had a chocolate lab that I just adored. His name was Sweet Pea and he and I got along famously. We really did. Whenever I would go over to their house, Sweet Pea and I would be inseparable. He followed every move I made. (Not the easiest thing to do in a small house with a huge dog!) I just loved him and I paid a lot of attention to him. Sweeet Pea was really old, however. And two weeks ago, when I last saw him, I got the profound impression that he wasn't going to be with us much longer. I didn't tell his owner that, but I sensed it. Even though Sweet Pea was in fine health and great spirits and seemed just exactly like he always did, I sensed it wouldn't be long. And I told myself, "Oh no, I don't want to still be living around here when he goes because it will break my heart." And I just gave him a lot of love that day.
I am supposed to be working for that client again tomorrow. That client wrote to me last night to tell me that Sweet Pea had died the other day, out of the blue. I was so sad, but also there was that bittersweet joy that I had taken extra time playing with him the last time I saw him, because I was thinking of his mortality.
In a way, it's what I'm feeling about this house. I know my days in it are numbered, and that its days on Earth are numbered, so I am just trying to take in every moment. All the daffodils are coming up. Some other little flowers have already bloomed -- even though we have another dusting of snow out there this morning. The robins have returned. There is a cardinal in my backyard who sings me awake every morning. I try to just take it all in and not think about the bulldozers that will be coming. Making that effort to find the joy in the fleeting moments. Just allow the joy. Feel gratitude. And accept change.
All right. Well. My final week in Bible Study Methods is upon me, and this week focuses on becoming a teaching minister, making my first lesson plan for bible study; being real as opposed to just thinking about being real. An interesting week.
Okay. I am not going to say "Happy Hump Day," (but if you watched that David Bowie video I posted a couple weeks ago, wasn't that so ironic that he said "happy hump day"???!!!) I'll just say, Happy Wednesday. I hope it's a good one, gang, wherever you are. Take a moment to cherish stuff today, okay? When we consciously cherish the moments, transition is easier. And I guarantee you, transition comes, in all sorts of ways. Thanks for visiting, gang! See ya.
[Not Sweet Pea, but close! Stay frisky, sweetheart. Onward.]
About Marilyn Jaye
Causes Marilyn Jaye Lewis Supports
The Film Council of Greater Columbus, Columbus, OH
The Adrienne Shelley Foundation, NY, NY
Paralyzed Veterans of America, Washington, DC...