Last night I shaved the strangest head I've ever shaved before. No...
I shaved my hair, at least in part, just so I could explore the subject on paper. I do not have Cancer nor am I Sinead O'Connor, though some of the best people are. I meant for that to read funny. My mother is my best critic. Except for my father. She says "you have the most interesting way of mis-spelling things."
Mistakes are funny. They bring me down off of my Virginia Woolf obsession induced high horse. I guess that is another reason why I shaved my head (and within one hour went to bed with my scalp wrapped in a scarf.)
My father used to say that when Virginia Woolf copied and pasted, it was with a real bottle of horse hoof glue and scissors. Things stuck together back then way better than they do now. Possibly accounting for the high divorce rate that is breaking up our society today.
My parents got divorced. Maybe I should add that to the list of reasons explaining why I shaved my head. Yes! I have been working on making a list like that. I will go around telling each person who asks something different. My writing teacher will think I shaved my head to spur on creativity. I will tell the annoying stinky man on the elevator that I shaved it to try to tame down the lice and that my hair is in that bag (that serendipidously brushed up against his shoulder). I will tell the chatty woman in the hallway that I shaved it to start my vow of silence.
And that was that.
When my Mom saw my head she said "It's really not that ugly!" (After a terribly long pause.) She would have loved that woman who told me I should not ever have short hair if I want to date men because I am a large woman. But that was a long time ago when I had long hair. I guess I have been cast off the heteronormative ship a long time.
It was really shocking when the locks first fell to the ground. I wanted to see my face with a shaved head. Once again some good glue would have come in handy, when the first curls started hitting the bathroom tiles. When I decided to go on, I just wanted to get it over with. But then I looked up at the mirror and there were my brothers Joey and Jay looking through my eyes. Except for one big difference: they are shaved and I, at least then, looked like I was frontally balding.
Mom is really warming up to me this visit! Now she says she "doesn't feel uncomfortable" with me! Progress is mine!
I will write something more reflective later. About the bravery it takes to shave my head, about the ways that people look at me, about the secrecy of wearing a headcover as opposed to going bare, about the influence of newness on my writing.
I will say that this change has opened up my writing and cleared up some hesitation that had been infecting me.
What's keeping you from writing? Commenting?