Discover the Character of your Mother with The Story Woman™
Could it be that you don't even like your mother? Ouch! Or maybe she's so special to you and you love her so much that you can't bring yourself to see her as someone distinct in her own right - someone separate from you. Have you ever taken the time to look at who your mother is at her core? Perhaps you don't want to look...too scary, too sad, too poignant, too intimate?
What were Mom's hopes and dreams? She had them you know, and she still does, if she's alive and well. But have you ever stopped to see her as an individual in her own right? And really, that's not something we're taught to do, so don't feel badly if you haven't; but now that you've got this idea in your head, why not do something about it?
Once upon a time your mother was a newborn baby, then someone's little girl, and a few years later a young woman with ideas and desires all her own. She had her whole adult life ahead of her and so many, many things to look forward to. As time went on, your mother became your mother, and that may be where you are stuck. She became just Mom or Mama or Mother, and she probably loved that role more than anything. In fact, as many mothers do, she may have given up a lot of herself for you.
I remember in a college psychology course, the professor asked us class members to look at ourselves in different stages of our lives. We were to visualize the baby we once were and take that baby into our hearts and give it love and understanding. And so on throughout the various stages of our lives. This was a good exercise - most of us learned more about ourselves, some gained compassion for themselves, and others began a healing process.
Try this exercise in a conscious effort to see your mother as she is at her core. Pull her into your heart as you visualize her as a young mother, for example. Meditate on this image of her for a few minutes while you bring in bits and pieces of the family stories you've heard over the years to connect with this new image you've made room for in your heart. This is a very good first step to begin to look at her as an individual. You may be surprised by what you see. You will gain empathy and understanding. And this will be the impetus you need to answer the provocative question I invariably ask people to answer, "If you could tell just one small story that would capture your mother's character and keep her spirit alive, what would it be?"
Write your bio-vignette about your mother using The Story WomanTM method today.