If We Still Had Prehensile Tails – 10 Things that Would Be Different
If We Still Had Prehensile Tails – 10 Things that Would Be Different
1. Couches, chairs and especially toilet seats wouldn’t be the same shape.
2. Camera tripods, shooting sticks, and hanging straps in subway trains would never have evolved.
3. Teenagers (and suburban housewives) would be shaving, piercing, and tattooing their tails.
4. Criminals would have their tails docked by degrees, three strikes no tail!
5. There would be tail warmers and a whole range of tail fashions.
6. Tails would be sex objects, tail porn!
7. Tailgate parties would be about something entirely different
8. The History Channel would have shows like “Great Tails in History” – famous men and women who triumphed (or failed spectacularly) with their tails.
9. Tails of The Rich And Famous. Tail lifts, tail plastic surgery, tail enhancements. And one day $6m bionic tails!
10. Tails in literature: A Tail of Two Cities, The Canterbury Tails, Tails of the Unexpected.
About Luke
Luke James has been telling stories since he broke his first window.
A first generation punk rock survivor, he was born and raised in the projects of Birmingham, England.
He has wanted to live in the USA since he saw The Lone Ranger when he was five-years-old...
Connections
Causes Luke James Supports
Amnesty International
NRDC
Doctors Without Borders
#6
Haha tail porn
Although I could very well imagine #5 as well.
As for the last one...I am only groaning in pain because that is one I would have thought of.
Top hat and ... sorry!
Thanks for the comment Joshua - means a lot to get some feedback! Have you read "Great Apes" by Will Self? Blew me away! I've bookmarked your site and I'll check it this weekend ... right after I get me some tail!
Good to meet you.
Cheers - Luke
I don't know why I was
I don't know why I was thinking about this but while I was looking at your response and then I thought "I bet Paris Hilton would make great monkey inspired line of clothing.
Berlin Ramada
Benobo ... for swingers ... by Berlin Ramada!
That was so funny
And children would be considered chimp off the old block.
follow the thread . . .
children would be considered chimp off the old block.
grrrrrroan lol lol
BTW Chaucer speaks of "tails" 16 times. The Summoner's story of a tail is a riot.
Radix malorem est cauda?
Thanks for reminding me of Chaucer - we studied The Pardonner's Tale and The Wife of Bath's Tale in A level English Lit at school. Then I saw Pasolini's movie and as a 17 year old went back and paid much closer attention to the, shall we say, more bawdy elements! :) Hope all is well with you Dolores.
Great Apes
No I haven't read yet , but once I settle down in a place I will get it. Right now I am banned from buying books until I at least finish one of the four i have started
Quantum reading
Yup, I get the same thing, mainly from my wife (who's a scientist) - I keep trying to tell her I'm quantum reading! In at least four parallel universes. Sadly we lost Borders and B&N in the space of a couple of months here. US city with a population of 225,000 and no book store. Ridiculous! Luckily we have a great library (hands off Sacramento!). I just discovered Christopher Buckley - now that is some great satire! I'd have been a bit nervous about writing and publishing Florence of Arabia though!
Tails in literature: A Tail of Two Cities, The Canterbury Tails
Thanks for reminding me of Chaucer -
Ah, but YOU reminded me.
If your interested in bawdy, look at the article on my website--"Chaucer's wicked poetic license." Doesn't take the reading time of a book. That's at
CelebrateChaucer.com