I been thinking lately about my idea of enough. My expectations for life, for my life and my future. For such a long time I thought that when I had the big house, the flashy car and the perfect relationship I would have it all. I would have made it. Now I have re-evaluated a few of those ideas, I have decided against that. Some of the happiest people in the world have the least material belongings.
I have come to realise that I dont need to have all those ultra luxurious things to be happy. As a child you are encouraged to follow your dreams. Believe what you want to believe and have the courage to go after what you want. But at some point you need to be realistic. I want to dream, but I need to sill be in the real world. I can dream of having an endless pit of money....but I dont have that. And I don’t really need it as long as I have enough money to be able to afford what I need and the little wants - which I do. I am soooo grateful for my job. It’s not hard, its good money, I have great benefits and I consider myself to be lucky. Sometimes I day dream of being a famous actress, a pop star, a best selling writer, a psychologist....but do I need to be these things to have a fulfilled and happy existence? No. I am ok how I am.
I would love to go on amazing exotic holidays but at the end of it, where are you? I dont really go out and celebrate the culture of the places that I go to. I might do odd excersions...but thats it. Otherwise its just sunbathing for two weeks out of the year, a roof over my head and food. So why pay out £2500 for that when I could find a nice last minute deal for £400 in a cheaper resort and have pretty much the same experience. I dont need a big fancy car. I think some cars are sexy. Mercedes SLK’s are well sexy but I could never drive one. Too big, too expensive. I would be much happier with a little run around and at the end of the day you got to think about the environment.
It is funny how through life experience your ideas of what makes you happy changes.
I always thought owning my own property would make me feel secure and give me a sense of achievement, when actually when I did have a mtg I hated it. I felt restricted and trapped and didnt really like the commitment to one place. Now I rent and I much refer it because I know if I did want to take off somewhere for a couple of months at a time I could wait for the lease to be up and off I go. FREEDOM!
I always thought that finding "the one" and getting married would give me the security and make me feel complete. I thought I found that person and after 5 amazing years together we went our seperate ways. I have since come to realise that it is obsurd to think there is only one person out there for you and to place that expectation on someone is just dooming yourself to failure! I am now in a relationship with someone who when we first starting dating I had no expectations of where it would lead and we are now happily living together and expecting our first baby! Crazy huh!
I figure as long as I have nough money to afford my house, the necessaties, afford my little luxuries (makeup, clothes, nails, hair, meals out, trips away) afford my hobbies (gym, reading, yoga) and afford to have my family taken care of (food, clothing, there futures) that is all I need really....OH and GRATITUDE. Cos it is being grateful for what I do have and not constantly chasing after what I think I want that is enough for me :-)