Pressure. Stress. Pressure. Stress.
I remember what it was like to be 10 years old on a summer day. Wake up. Eat breakfast. Get dressed. Go outside and play until lunch. After lunch go outside and play until dinner. After dinner rinse and repeat the next day. So went the days of summer. Interrupted only by picnics, summer camps, trips to the zoo and the like. I often joke that I would like to be 10 years old again. My job was either school or play. Boys weren't on my radar unless I was beating them up and Barbie ruled my kingdom. But when we are 10 years old it's all we can do to keep from exploding with frustration we want to be grown up so badly. As girls we want to grow breasts, get married and have babies. We think it is so glamorous to drive a car and go to work. Even though all of the adults around us try to slow us down and quiet our longing with tales of how we should enjoy our time as children. Being grown up will come soon enough. We should have listened.
Fast forward a few decades and here we are. We are that wife, that mother, that employee, that stressed out individual trying to figure out how to manage it all. We discover that money does not come in an endless supply and there is never enough of it. We discover that trying to make sure your kids have those same carefree summer days you enjoyed is actually a lot of work. We have mates who may help or may hinder. Maybe we don't have a mate at this point and we have triple the load. (As women the load is double with a mate, so just triple it without one.) We are constantly bombarded with images of perfect mother, wife, sister, friends who have it all together. The obvious conclusion is the problem lies with me. If I just buckle down, get organized, be more disciplined I too can be Martha Stewart. Um, no. Well if that works for you then great. For me, it makes me more insane. My family doesn't do well with structure. They rebel. Which stresses me out. They complain. Which stresses me out. They ridicule. Which stresses me out. They exceed my limits, push my buttons, try everything they can to restore the chaos to our lives. Is it worth it? No.
There are levels of stress and pressure within all of our lives. We can buckle under it or buckle down and deal with it. Or, we can do neither and go with the flow. I'm flowing. Just like I did when I was 10 years old.