Love makes people do and think crazy things. We've heard this line a million times and yet what does that really look like?
For me, a 31-year old, never-been-married, never-had-kids, owns 2 cats kind of girl, dating has been, well, non-existant for the past year and a half. I refuse to date anyone I work with (been there, tried that, not doing it again), I no longer go to bars on the weekend (not that you can meet anyone of quality there usually anyway), and most of my friends are married and don't have single male friends to introduce me to, so that leaves me home alone with my cats on a Friday and Saturday night.
What crazy thing has love made me do to combat all of that? Go online to find love. At first, this is a very frustrating blow to the ego. I'll watch the number of people visiting my profile go up while the number of new emails and winks stays at zero for days on end. Then, finally, I meet a guy who seems incredible on paper: he has a masters degree in English, with an emphasis on linguistics, espeically Old and Middle English. For those of you not familiar with my love of the English language, this is like fireworks and rainbows and puppy dogs for me.
We correspond for about two weeks back and forth, with long, detailed emails. I am really digging this guy and am eager to continue finding out more about him. We graduate to talking on the phone and texting, which is also enjoyable, so we decide to take it to the scary next step: meeting each other face-to-face.
Honestly, the date itself wasn't bad; he was quite the gentleman--he made sure I wasn't cold and bought me dinner and drinks at a nice place and we had a decent conversation. Overall, it was a good date. But there really wasn't the fireworks and rainbows and puppy dogs I was expecting. It just was sparklers, I guess.
That's what leads me to say dating sucks. I am tired of going through the awkward first dates and wondering if the reason the other person talks so much about themselves is because they are nervous or because they are pompous and conceited. I am tired of wondering if the second and third kisses will be better than the first. I am tired of not knowing how I will know when I've met the right person. I am tired of theoretically deciding what I can and can't live without in a man and then re-adjusting that when I meet the "real" men in person. Truthfully, I am just tired of dating and am ready to find Mr. Right, if he even exists.
I think Hollywood has screwed me up royally. Is there even a prince on a white horse to ride you into the sunset? I know the whole "riding into the sunset" thing is more like a life of hard work and compromise to make a marriage succeed, but I've got to believe there is still a "prince," right?