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Get Me Off This Ride
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Nothing's a small thing. It all flipping matters.
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Because of the kidney and anemia scare of late February, I have been the purest form of human being of late.  I could be an astronaut, I'm so clean--no drugs (ibuprofen, please), no alcohol, much less caffeine.  I'm all about the leafy greens, the prunes, the wholesome everything.  I am a body unmitigated.

So this month, watching the arc of hormones, I truly saw what those little mischief makers do to me, this clean, clear, peri-menopausal woman.  You'd think I was 13, or something.  You'd think Michael would have left me or something. 

Last night, I went out with some friends for dinner and then to the theater to watch a few short plays.  I dragged my body there, feeling like a sledge hammer had battered me for a few hours.  The green tea perked me up, but by the end of the evening, I was in tears, and it wasn't from the acting or the plays.  I was just crying.  When I arrived home, I was so upset over absolutely nothing and then I fell asleep.  Only to awaken with a migraine.

Now what purpose all this?  For god's sake, I don't need this arc of pain-in-the-assness.  Turn the damn stuff off!  Of course, it's nice to have the hormones flowing, the bones stay strong, the hair stays full.  But really, what a waste of energy.

I will persevere.  I'm off to work, my eyes feeling punched in, my head a throbbing.  By mid-day, the headache will be but a memory that I will only remember next month, when this happens again.

Whoever figured out this system really needs a good talking to. 

Jessica

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"i will preserver"

If I had been inclined to think you were exaggerating your misery earlier in the piece, that typo would have changed my mind completely!  : )  But I believed you from the start.  Best of luck surviving the monthly onslaught, Jessica!

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Good lord! I realized that I

Good lord!

I realized that I was back around 1 pm.  Now I can spell:

persevere

Thanks, Evie.  shocking, that.

Best,

J

Jessica Barksdale Inclan www.jessicabarksdaleinclan.com

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shocking, maybe . . .

. . . but actually kind of wonderful, at that. I'm going to hold on to that phrase -- "I will preserver" -- for those moments when I'm so panicked I know exactly what I need (a life-preserver, sanity-preserver, budget preserver, all-purpose-preserver!), but am too off-kilter to communicate it properly! : )

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Or--I will "preserve

Or--I will "preserve her."

Her, being ourselves? I've been thinking about this for hours now.

We need a giant preserver, I think, for so many things!

Best,

J
Jessica Barksdale Inclan
www.jessicabarksdaleinclan.com