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Another Thought about Three Good Things--Join in

I was reading Lisa Warren's and Kristy Kiernan's blogs about good things, and Lisa put her's into threes.  I will admit to having a moment of just sadness that I've not had three really fabulous things recently.  I fell into a funk about my writing career, my teaching life, the fact that my son wants to purchase a rifle.  I started thinking about how old I look in the photo that Huntington so nicely posted.  I began to daydream about plastic surgery.  I began to contemplate how soon my time on earth would be over, and I worried that all the good things weren't going to have time to happen. 

Basically, I fell briefly into "What about me-ness", a habit I find disgusting in myself and pitiable in others.  But it's a strong current, this what about me-ness.  It plays, yes, to blues, and it's about what I don't have and what I need, and on and on.  Please, hit me on the head with a frying pan.

I don't mean to take away anything from Lisa or Kristy.  Not at all.  If I were more psychologically evolved, I would be bowing in their directions (I am, actually) and clapping (okay, I'm clapping too, now.  But it took me a second to get there).  I merely want to present my own "it's all about me-ness" to you, and then, if you happened to feel envy or irritation or fear when reading their blogs, a quick way of solving the minor psychological crisis.

So here it is, the way to get real and reframe:  Three good things that happened to me today:

1.  My plane landed beautifully and early.

2.  My friend Elizabeth picked us up at the airport and was there when we walked out to the curb.

3.  My plants were all still alive, despite my absence.

Good ahead.  Let me know, even if the things are truly out of the ball park. 

Jessica

Comments
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jessica

I like your spirit! Positive energy generally draws positive energy, so your luck's about to change . . . even if it takes awhile to manifest. (But I feel you on your son and the rifle; that one, unlike your career trials, is not one your behavior can impact as directly, assuming he's not underage.) Positive vibes to you!

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thanks Evie

from what you always write, I'd have to say that your energy is just brilliant with goodness.

Yes, the rifle is a problem, but he is, ironically, a very liberal pacifist--he's always been a conundrum!

Best,

J

Jessica Barksdale Inclan www.jessicabarksdaleinclan.com

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I adore

YOU.

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And THAT

is another damn good thing!

J

Jessica Barksdale Inclan www.jessicabarksdaleinclan.com

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My 3 Good Thing

!. I'm still alive

2. I'm learning every day

3. The people I love are alive and well.

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Being alive is a good thing

and I think I take it for granted pretty much all the time.

J

Jessica Barksdale Inclan www.jessicabarksdaleinclan.com

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I know that feeling, it

I know that feeling, it rises periodically, and it's awful. For me, the listing of things doesn't work, I still get all nasty and "yeah, but" about the disappointments. But that kind of general disappointment and envy and malaise - it's like the flu, Jessica. I try to treat it as a flu: I am kind to myself, drink water, take a nap, take a walk. Try taking a break from the things that cause you discomfort: if you had the flu you woudn't go to work or you'd infect your coworkers... It's a flu, and it's not your usual state, and it will pass. (Feel better soon!)

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I think it's also difficult

I think it's also difficult to hear about these things sometimes when it's not placed in the context of a whole life or even say, a five or ten year period. I can assure you, this is the first run of good news I've had in several years. It is so dramatically different than the past 5 years of my life, in fact, that I am tempted to hole up somewhere and hide because surely, SURELY, something major and horrible is just around the corner. It's absurd, of course it is, but I can't help it after the past few years.

If anyone's feeling ANY envy about my good news, give me a call, and I'll regale you with my five years of woe, which just seemed to go on, and on, and ON, and by the time we hang up you'll be quite pleased to be you, and to know that it all goes in phases. It was well past time for me move into a new phase, and I'm all too aware that it will end soon enough, and then your phase of good news will begin. And I shall bow, and clap, and wait for mine to come back around.

And, I appreciate your honesty and the opportunity to talk about it.

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Kristy--I am truly happy for

Kristy--I am truly happy for you, but I found in myself this kind of ugly little jealousy "flu" as Ericka likened it to.  I found that horrible in myself, and then I wanted to reframe.  I think that your news is very well deserved and well earned, and I hope you didn't think I was saying otherwise.  And I know from what you wrote earlier, it was just about damned time for it!

Here's to new phases for us all!  And here's to much bowing and clapping in your general direction.

J

Jessica Barksdale Inclan www.jessicabarksdaleinclan.com

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Three Good Things... drat, what were they?

I had to comment because the sense of mortality you had was so strong and honest.  I could feel for  you, so I wanted to comment.  I happened to be feeling great and wanted to pass it on until I had to fill out the darned form to comment here.  It asked so many things, such as my age.  God.  My age was so far down the list in choices, I started crying.  Then it asked for the name of my first pet that died, how I felt the first and last times I'd been stood up, and my reply when a son or daughter yells, "I hate you!"  Then I wasn't feeling so good.  Why's the form so long?  What's the point of that form, anyway--to make us feel like writers?

Anyway, I want to thank you for saying good things in your blog about my new book, Months and Seasons.  Now that made me feel good.

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Three Good Things... if I can remember them

I was moved when I read this entry, Jessica, because I could feel your mortality at work, and your vulnerability was like a pearl at an oyster bar. I clicked on "Comment" because I had a few upbeat things to say, but then a form came up.  It said I had to be a member first, and I had to fill out the form.  I'm wary of forms because I sense the Bush administration sucks up such forms, particularly this one that asked so many questions. 

One of the first questions was "Age?"  I had to scroll so far down on the list, I started crying.  Then it asked for the name of my first dead pet.  (Kitty) What was the first sad story I ever read?  ("The Necklace" by Guy du Mapausant).  How old was I when I first fell in love outside of my parents?  (Sixteen). How old was I when I was first jilted?  The fact that it was a week later had me crying again.  What were these questions for?  Was this to become a writer?

I typed away because I had to make my comment.  Now that I'm in, I forgot what the three good things were.  Gosh, I miss Kitty....

By the way, thank you for mentioning my new book, Months and Seasons, in your blog.  With over 200,000 books out a year, it's sure easy to be overlooked--but you looked and even bought it.  You're the best.

(If this thing doesn't know my name, it's from Chris.  If it does know my name, then I'm right to be paranoid.)

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Both of these showed up!

And you did a good job with them.  Look, you are always feeling pretty good, and that's an amazing thing about you!  And I do believe that you are right about forms in general.  I think on my web site contact page it asks for age, and not a few people have given me some grief about that.

Glad you are here on redoom, though, Chris.  It's a wonderful place!

J

Jessica Barksdale Inclan www.jessicabarksdaleinclan.com

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Another good thing

... was reading this post. Thanks. Good to remind ourselves that, actually we are enormously privileged just to be able to think about these things (I just finished reading Mike Davis, Planet of Slums, which is tremendously depressing about the the state the others are in). So -- 3 good things today. Sun came up brightly, my most loved one was there in bed beside me as she has been for many years, and I've read some good things on the 'net, including your blog. So thanks again.