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Just one little boy, with a gun

I have strong opinions.  Too often, I keep them to myself, which is cowardly.  

I promised I would not write another sad story for at least awhile.  This isn't a tale.  It's true and it happened, here.

                                                                        * * * * 

“We’ll probably never know why,” the police chief said, in response to the reporters’ questions.  “He acted alone.”

Case closed.

                                                                        * * * * 

This is what I want to say to the little boy who shot himself in the woods by the middle school earlier this week.

“I promised my friends I would write no more sad stories for awhile.  I like to make others laugh, not feel bad.  I’ll take on your sadness, alone.  I'm an adult.  It's my province.

“Don’t think your death was insignificant.  It wasn’t.   Right now, all I can think about is how you ran into the woods, alone.  I've imagined, ceaselessly, what you may have been thinking in those long minutes before you took your own life a few days before your fourteenth birthday.

“When you saw the Sherriff’s car and knew it had been summoned because you arrived at school with a gun.  What would happen if you surrendered. 

“When I was your age, we were permitted to be children.  We were told we would learn from our mistakes, although truthfully, most of us had no clue what we were supposed to learn from falling off our bicycles, other than how to fall on the grass, rather than the concrete. 

“That’s all I can say to you, now.  I’ll reserve the rest of my comments and address them to the adults.

“If I can find just one who will listen.”

Comments
18 Comment count
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Just one case

That is just one case.  That's what my daughter said when she heard about Paris Jackson this week.  It's just one  case when there are so many, she said.  Yours is just one more.  But in total, this is horrific and terrible.

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Just one case

Just one case.

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Makes you wonder how a 14

Makes you wonder how a 14 year old could get a loaded gun to kill himself and what could have been so terrible he had to resort to this. . . .How many more. . .?

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Two important questions

The available information indicates he took the gun from his home.  Since children here can be charged, tried and punished as adults, I cannot help but wonder if that knowledge fueled his despair.  His family is undoubtedly overwhelmed with grief, but so are many others.  

I hated to post this, but I couldn't bear not to.  Thanks for your concern and comments.

Jane

 

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I've felt slightly queasy all

I've felt slightly queasy all day, thinking about this.  I couldn't get it out of my head.

What kind of twisted world are we living in, where a child takes his own life? There is no word for such a harrowing tragedy.

 

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I struggled with this

I eventually realized there are no appropriate words, either alone or in combination, that I could have used.  The most sickening feeling of all is the recognition that I am no longer appalled by the indifference of so many. More significantly, though, I'm angry with myself for allowing my own fears to hijack my rationality.

The glib and simple answer is that gun owners should secure firearms kept in their homes.  The sadder reality is that the ongoing, fruitless debate over the 2nd Amendent to the U.S. Constitution takes precedence, while the loss of a young life is regarded as inconsquential.  

I'm sorry to have upset you and apologize for climbing up on a soapbox to address something that happened in an obscure place.  This is a personal issue, since the opinions and actions of the members of this community more often than not, disappoint me.  That said, I know we are neither isolated nor unique.  

Thanks for your indulgence.

xo 

Jane

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Powerful words

That's very powerful, Jane. Your words choke me, especially when I hink about my boys so close to that age. Often, no words can decribe the sadness of an incident or how we feel to it. It's beyoned sadness and understanding that sadness. 

Thanks for sharing and being open to sharing. M

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How do we inspire our kids?

In moments of despair, to comfort them, do we say, "You can't change the world."?

We created many of the problems that have given rise to our children's fears, but their future depends on their ability to develop and use their own problem-solving skills.  It's a dilemma, perhaps more for me than for others, who I'm sure, write me off as an addled old woman.

When I think of the most contented moments in my life, I inevitably recall tending my garden.  Maybe I should pot tomatoes, today.  I think I will.

Thanks for reading and commenting.  

Hugs,

Jane

 

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Take care, Jane

We humans have created the problems that exist today and we must accept the consequences and deal with them as best we can. Everyone deals with them in their own individual way and each individual way is right for that moment. There is no wrong way. We learn from each way.

You come to terms with what happened in your own way and know that's the best way for you, Jane. Take care. x

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We humans

I'm grappling with the phrase, "we humans," since I haven't witnessed much humanity, lately.   It's taken me some time to understand this rugged and ragged little community, which is silently grieving, before moving on.

Thanks, Moni.  

xo

Jane

 

 

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No one

I listened.

A teenager took his life in my neck of the woods recently, as well, over an accusation that he did something terrible that he didn't do.

At my job, I'm rarely thanked for doing my job well.  What they thank me most for is just being someone they can count on.  Some stability.  "A home base," as one said recently.  Another said that I was one of the few who had hope for her.  That I gave her confidence in herself. 

Ultimately, I think they're thankful for me because I'm just someone who listens.  And, occasionally, advises.

I suppose the two young ones you and I speak of did not have such a person.  They had no one at all.

Or, at least, they thought they didn't.

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Listening

He was being home-schooled by his parents.  The assistant principal, who spotted him in the parking lot with the gun before he fled into the woods, tried to reach him. Her actions were characterized as stupid rather than heroic.


 

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Par for the Course

As usual lately, the public--this time, in your area--had a reaction to schools and teachers that was bass-ackwards.

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One person's bass-ackwards is another's community pride, I guess

I can't change my perspective or my opinions, but neither can I keep them to myself.  I'm grateful there a few who agree.  Perhaps, in time, there will be a few more.

Thanks, Steven.

Jane

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Something like this affects

Something like this affects not just families, towns and news cycles; something like this affects the entire psyche of humanity.

Because things have changed too much for our children, our families, and other social support systems to adapt, and increasing societal stress, emotional disassociation (via inundation with electronic distractions), and a lack of interaction is making us disconnected from one another.  Throw in a weapon, and we have a tragedy.   

As a simple illustration of what I mean, I once read somewhere that the invention of the air conditioner is what began the modern isolation of human beings from each other.  We used to hear our neighbors talk through open windows--their voices carrying out and letting us know what was going on, what stresses they might be enduring; where we could play a role in helping them--and would see them outside on their porches after the air cooled down for the day.  But the air conditioner has boxed us all up inside our houses--with no open windows--and it's whir outside the home is a white noise that masks what's going on in the world around us.  

Of course, none of this can assuage our concern for that poor young man in his final moments.   In fact, it most especially shouldn't.  

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The prevailing sentiment

The prevailing sentiment is, "There's no sense in blowing this all out of proportion."

Just one little boy.

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So sad!!!

Every day as I read about a new autricity and I long for and I wonder what wonder what happened t0 the world I once knew. Bless his young soul and may God/dess guide him to something better.  

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Amen

Patricia,

Thanks for your kind words.  <3

Jane