If Sara Palin were President of the United States, I would be as smart as the President of the United States.
If Sara Palin were President, I could understand everything she says, because she doesn't use adult vocabulary.
If Sara Palin were President, then I could be President, too -- right now.
If Sara Palin were President, all the parodies on YouTube would not be funny. In fact, they're not very funny right now because they're not really parodies.
If Sara Palin were President, even girls who would rather hurt their babies than have their parents find out they were pregnant might have to have the babies instead of stopping the pregnancy before it was too late. Some of them might be my age.
If Sara Palin were President, I think she really would believe that the destruction of the habitat of polar bears really was part of the End of Days and what God wants and she would be happy about it, but I don't think that and it makes me feel miserable.
If Sara Palin were President, I might have to do things not even my parents force me to do, such as praying in school.
If Sara Palin were President, it would break the glass ceiling that women can see through but not get through, but all the glass from the ceiling would fall on us.
Francie Brent is my daughter, a seventh grader in Wisconsin. She made these comments while we were baking and freezing Christmas cookies -- a mother-and-daughter activity, across the kitchen table, in the heart of the heart of the country, where liberals who also love their children honor American traditions. Francie was adopted at birth, and comes from a pro-choice family who believes that every abortion is a tragedy.
Causes Jacquelyn Mitchard Supports
National MS Society, Women Against MS, National Center for Missing and Exploited Children, One Writer's Place