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Can We Really Have It All?

Can we really have it all?

I think that depends upon your definition of "it all."

I work from home doing criminal appeals.  I have a contract with the State, so my cases are all appointed, and I make the same amount each month whether 1 case comes in or 100 cases come in.  It would be rare to only have a single case due, just as I have never had 100 cases due in the same month. It is not unusual for me to have 2-6 cases due in a month, which means I'm spending a lot of my time actually working.

I also have two kids, one going into 5th grade and one going in to 8th. They attend magnet schools, and we live out of the "attendance zone", so there is no bus service. Their schools are on the same street, less than a mile apart, but 11 miles from my home. This means I have to drive them to and from school every day.  The 8th grader can be dropped off between 6:50 and 7:25. The 5th grader can't be dropped off until 8:00.  In the afternoon, the oldest gets out at 2:40, the youngest at 3:20. I spend a significant amount of time driving, sitting in carpool, and waiting to either drop a child off or pick a kid up.

I also write books. I have a mystery series published by Oak Tree Press. After the first book, Gumbo Justice, was published, it took me two years to write the second book and get it to my publisher for release.  I just reached the year mark from when the second book, Jambalaya Justice, was published, and hope to have the third, Chocolate City Justice, to my publisher and released by the end of the year. I won't even go into how long it took me to write the first novel, but once I signed with my publisher, it took an extra year to get it published because I was in a head-on collision with a drunk driver that left me incapacitated with surgeries and immobile for 7 months.

I have a husband, a dog, a deaf cat, two guinea pigs, a tank of fish, and two cats that live outside. Despite the fact that they all occasionally take a back seat to other things, they all love and appreciate me. Even the cats.

I have a house that generally has dishes in the sink, laundry that needs to be washed, and floors that need to be mopped.

Do I think I have it all?

I don't think I DON'T have it all, if that makes sense.  I definitely have everything I need.  I have all the things that are important to me. I have a family that is healthy and happy, a job doing what I love, and a book contract with a great and patient publisher.

Of course I would rather make enough money so I didn't struggle to pay bills. I would love to write a NYT bestseller, or have one of my books made into a movie or HBO series.  If asked, I would rather not be horizontally and vertically challenged.  Given the choice, I would win the lottery.  Most of all, as long as I'm wishing, I would love to no longer limp or have hardware in my legs and arm.

But those things are not really included in my "it all." So for me, the answer is yes, I can have it all.

Having it all doesn't require lowering your standards, but deciding those things that are so important you can't be happy without them.  Do you think you can have it all?

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What a wonderful and

What a wonderful and inspiring blog Holli!  You definitely HAVE IT ALL, and I thank you for the reminder... 

I used to justify to myself, "it's a trade-off"... I guess it's similar if not the same as having or not having it all.  But these are just terms or phrases we hear in many varying situations.

At the end of the day, whether a trade-off or having it all, it's what defines these words that make all the difference.

Oh yes!  I do have it ALL too :-)

Thank you!


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Having it All

Rina, it's all in the way you look at life, I think. It's kind of like people who say their glass is half full instead of half empty, although I say it's completely full, half with water and half with Oxygen.  Holli