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Zaftan Miscreants: Book 2 of the Zaftan Trilogy
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Hank gives an overview of the book:

  THE CRAZINESS CONTINUES.... The craziness continues as the Gundarlandian Navy challenges the zaftans in deep space.  The main characters, Sam, an android and Klatze, a zaftan officer face unique situations that test their mettle and desire as they struggle to survive in the midst of chaos. Zaftan Miscreants continues the humor and satire that set the first book apart from other sci-fi and fantasy stories.
Read full overview »

 

THE CRAZINESS CONTINUES....

The craziness continues as the Gundarlandian Navy challenges the zaftans in deep space.  The main characters, Sam, an android and Klatze, a zaftan officer face unique situations that test their mettle and desire as they struggle to survive in the midst of chaos.

Zaftan Miscreants continues the humor and satire that set the first book apart from other sci-fi and fantasy stories.

Read an excerpt »

PROLOGUE

The battle cruiser and fleet flagship, Red Death, hung motionless in space just under a third of a parsec from Ceti Taub.  The rest of the zaftan attack force deployed in battle formation around it.  All the silver-colored ships had a cylindrical shape with a blunt nose.  Weapons and engine pods broke the otherwise smooth outer surface.  Seen from a distance, the fleet formation resembled a sheet of black velvet with bright specks of diamonds arranged in a box pattern.

In the Red Death's flight deck, Commodore Gongeblazn lounged on his couch and looked for something or someone to annoy him.  Happy only when he had something to carp about, he was annoyed that nothing annoyed him.  Like all noble-born zaftans, Gongeblazn stood over seven feet tall and weighted more than four hundred pounds; his bulk overcrowded the small flight deck.  Atop his small round head with its cruel beak-like mouth, a pair of two-inch-long eyestalks supported his eyes, black with red irises.  His gray-black skin oozed green slime.  One of his eight tentacles held a gold-emblazoned lash with leather thongs tipped with yellow metal.  The lash symbolized his high rank as did the gold, diamond-encrusted medallion hanging from a gold chain around his neck.

Two other zaftans, the navigation shaman and the engineer, operated consoles in the front of the flight deck while a third, Captain Fleigel, sat to Gongeblazn's right.

Gongeblazn lifted a tentacle and fondled the medallion.  It signified that he was a fleet commander.  He led the strongest fleet ever to venture this close to gundarlandian-controlled space.

He rotated an eyestalk to peer at the engineer.  "Memzer, wake up Gevelt."

"He is still in his navigational coma, Commodore," Memzer replied

"Nonsense.  Give him a shove."

Gevelt almost fell off his couch from the shove.  He recovered and his eyestalks swept the area seeking danger.  They alighted on Gongeblazn.  "Greetings, Commodore."

"How dare you return from your scouting mission and not report to me."

"My journey was far and difficult.  After I returned, I paused to compose my report to you and fatigue overcome me."

"You lie.  Someday, I will catch you in a lie and then your miserable life will be forfeited.  What did you find out?"

"I found no evidence of the gundy fleet.  All I saw was the frigates wreaking havoc on their shipping."

"This is true, Commodore."  Captain Fleigel dipped her eyestalks.  "We just received a new report from the frigate squadron.  They have boarded and looted almost every trading vessel within a half-parsec.  Now they attack the colony base defenses."

"Why has this not brought out the gundy navy, hmm?  I do not like this."  Gongeblazn's eyes swept the flight deck.  "Where is my aide?"

"I am here, Commodore."  A six-foot-tall zaftan ranker slithered across the deck and stood near Gongeblazn.  "How may I serve you?"

"By standing still."  Gongeblazn lashed the aide's torso with a vicious stroke of his whip.

The aide's skin quivered under the blow.  Slime splattered the immediate area.  "Thank you, Commodore.  May I have another?"

"Fleigel!" Gongeblazn roared.  "Get this carrion out of my presence.  Take a note.  Never allow him to be my aide again.  Throw him in the brig.  Or overboard.  Then get me a new aide."

"Please instruct me."  Fleigel cowered on her couch.  "What has he done?"

"He likes getting whipped.  How can I enjoy his suffering when he likes it more than I do?"

"I will get you an aide who will howl in pain at the sight of your lash."

"Make it so.  Now where is

hank-quense's picture

The excerpt is only the beginning.  The situation goes steadily downhill (downspace?) from there.  This book has the most unusual charactrers you've ever met. Emotional droids and computers, aliens, bith good and bad, and an ancient robot who awaits the coming of the Mechanical Messiah.  Great fun!

About Hank

Award-winning author Hank Quense lives in Bergenfield, NJ with his wife Pat. They have two daughters and five grandchildren. He writes humorous fantasy and scifi stories. On occasion, he also writes an article on fiction writing or book marketing but says that writing...

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