Let’s Talk about Your Good Looks.
Being born with what appear to be natural advantages may be handicap. For example, being tall is usually thought of as a good thing, but it’s a distinct disadvantage on long airplane trips, or while stooping to use sinks, counters and mirrors designed for people of average height.
So it is with other supposed advantages. Being imaginative is an ostensible bonus, as long as your mind doesn’t put its talent to work torment you with creative “what if?” scenarios. Or intelligence, which is thought of a good thing, but it can leave one feeling alone, and frustrated with your inability to change systems that are in obvious need of reform. Being good looking delivers huge, unfair advantages. Studies show that juries are more lenient with attractive defendants than with unattractive ones charged with the same crime. Good looking people get instant and sometimes sustained attention regardless of the nature of their character.
But good looks have their dark side too; the attractive person may inevitably come to believe –to some degree—that that can get by with doing a little less than the ordinary person. They may become self centered, even narcissistic, and miss out on the fact that that their looks are a mere speck in a world filled with other attractive people and wondrous things.
Whenever I find myself wishing I was better looking, smarter, more imaginative, or had some other quality I think would be an advantage, I try to remember to stop myself. First, do I really have a choice, except to the extent I can sharpen whatever appearances or skills I really do have? And do I really want the problems that go along with the supposed advantages; do I really want to risk thinking I don’t have to try as hard, love as much, or be as much? Sometimes I wonder if the qualities we don’t have are the ones that help us to be the most of who we really are.
Just Trust Me: Finding the Truth in a World of Spin www.GRKasten.com