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Sprinklin' Steroids On The Cornflakes...

HEADLINE: "Baseball Hall Of Fame eschews steroid users."

But allow me to paraphrase comedian (and genuis-level iconoclast) Lewis Black:

"Superhuman strength? The endurance of a thousand crazed Kenyans? The bodies of Greek gods?

"The question is NOT 'why were they using steroids?'

"The REAL question is 'why the hell aren't the rest of us?!!?'"

-- Earl Merkel

http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/tue-october-16-2012/back-in-black---lance-armstrong--butt-chugging---farm-animal-sex

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Side Effects May Vary...

From Faithful Reader Morgan (via Facebook):  "Shrunken testicles, acne,diminished sex drive, roid rage and kidney damage come to mind..."

EM Response: I'm tempted to quip "Nothing ventured, nothing gained." But since the list you cite is virtually a direct quote from my now-digitized-Health Care Act medical files... well, personally: bring on that needle, Young Whippersnapper Doctor...