If you must struggle to awaken, you won't. Salvation, enlightenment, awakening - it really does not matter what label you wish to give it - to wake up to who you really are...to your spiritual oneness with Life itself, takes no effort whatsoever. You are awake already.
What else is GRACE, if not this? Grace is the awareness that dawns within you that the person God wishes you to become IS the person you are already. Stop making grace into an unfinished work. You could never become who you are. Why try? It is exhausting. I know. I tried for nearly forty years. Then, one day, I awakened. The struggle ended. Joy was born. It remains to this day.
Know this: you are awake, too.
"How may I know for sure?" you ask.
Why else would you ask the question?
This is the secret to happiness.