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David Valdes Greenwood's Blog

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May.17.2011
Seven years ago today, the first same-sex nuptials were legalized in Massachusetts, occasioning reactions that ran the gamut from teary-eyed joy to furious disbelief. Soon after, my husband and I adopted a baby girl, and have busied ourselves ever since with things like teaching her to walk and to...
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May.07.2011
Question: Where can I find the following family? Two gay dads -- one slender and uncomfortable offering public displays of affection, the other hefty and prone to flamboyant gestures. Add one adopted daughter of another race, the youngest member of an extended family whose senior patriarch is...
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Apr.20.2011
"How do babies get out of a mommy's tummy?"Like so many incredibly loaded topics, this question arrived over dinner. Diva was then 4, a preschooler whose primary understanding of adult female anatomy came from Barbie. We'd been joined for supper by Diva's Auntie Mikey, to whom she...
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Apr.18.2011
My life doesn’t seem very radical most days: I teach my students how to write, come home for family dinner around the table, put my daughter to bed, and then start picking up the abandoned Barbies, empty water glasses, and half-read magazines that comprise the domestic detritus of my house. But...
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Mar.30.2011
AOL's family site ParentDish has created a new column, The Family Gaytriarchs, in which I am one of two alternating columnists. This is the first time ever that a mainstream media outlet has ever added gay parents to their official roster of columnists and I am thrilled to be helping break this new...
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Mar.17.2011
Today is a very exciting day for me, as I have a chance to make a little history. AOL's family site ParentDish has created a new column, The Family Gaytriarchs, in which I am one of two alternating columnists. This is the first time ever that a mainstream media outlet has ever added gay parents to...
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Feb.06.2011
“Who’s coming over?” My daughter asked this question innocently enough, and when I answered that we weren’t expecting anyone, her reply was telling: “Then why are you cleaning the house?” It does not seem like a good sign that my daughter believes one never cleans if guests are not imminent. But...
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Jan.25.2011
(There has been a frenzy of attention around Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, Amy Chua's exaggeratedly stereotypical parenting memoir. Having read it, I might sum up its core message as "Chinese mothers believe that you can raise the best concert pianists by being cruel to them for years....
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Jan.19.2011
“Because he’s the ‘Daddy,’” said Diva, as she held up her tiny fingers to make air quotes. The Hubby and I were thunderstruck, not by whatever point she was trying to make, but by the fact that our 5 year-old was using air quotes. We burst out laughing, partly from shock, partly from nervousness as...
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Jan.04.2011
Diva stood in line with her classmates, looking at the “Word Wall” board, knowing that she was supposed to be able to decipher the assembled letters in front of her—and she panicked. There was a “t” but no “h” so she knew it wasn’t “the,” but feeling the pressure of eyes upon her, she couldn’t...
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Dec.15.2010
Out of the blue, three weeks before Christmas, Diva suddenly had a terrible thought. “We don’t have a chimney!” Both Daddy and I knew exactly what she was saying, but we let it play out. “How will Santa get the presents in without a chimney?” Lit by the dangerous glow of the same hot, colored light...
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Dec.02.2010
Diva: “I don’t WANT to go to a tree-lighting!" Papa: “I don’t WANT to hear any more whining!” Ah yes, the fine art of mimicking one’s child with horrible sing-song precision. It’s such an elegant parenting strategy, that I can’t imagine why more experts don’t recommend it. Oh sure, it’s rude,...
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Nov.21.2010
The stranger purses her lips and then shakes her head sadly. “Well, I guess I didn’t make an impression on you.” When she says this, we are standing in the busy playground across from Diva’s school. I’m happily passing a sunny late fall afternoon chatting with other parents I don’t yet know. Except...
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Nov.05.2010
“So when, exactly, does the ‘threat and reward’ period end?” When I asked this innocent question two summers ago, I was sitting in the home of The Hubby’s cousins, The O’s. The O’s have four school-aged children, and they always make the whole damn process of parenthood look so manageable that it...
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Oct.23.2010
Diva burst into tears. Normally, I would follow those four words with something descriptive like “…when we told her it was bedtime” or “…when she lost her ‘My Little Pony’ unicorn” or “…when the bear attacked.” But this week, it hardly seems worth categorizing why she was a yowling mess; to do so...
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