I would be a very wealthy man today (well, probably dead, but very wealthy) if I hadn't bought those damn Austria-Hungarian war bonds. Friggin country has been around for three hundred years, and just marries themselves out of trouble whenever things get sticky. I figured, worst case scenario, that they would marry off a spare semi-beautiful daughter to the Czar. Who knew? All I really wanted to do was get married, have a few kids, a discreet affair or two-you know, live a normal life.
The trouble with dying young is that people think they have the right to fill in any blanks they want and no one can refute them. Some smart alec even retouched my photo so that I would look more, I don't know, haunted or something. How can anybody live up to that sort of hype? It's just a matter of time until someone 'debunks' the 'myth' of Kafka, and I suppose I'll be harder to find on bookshelves (do they still have bookshelves?) and not referred to by anyone with any artistic pretentions, which is pretty much everybody, after all. I wrote that last sentence just to show I've still got my German-long-sentence mojo going for me. I could go on like that for pages, but I don't feel like it.
I am especially irritated with the Anglo-Saxons, who have made 'The Trial' into some sort of 'Alice in Wonderland' lotus eater extravaganza, like I was imagining some sort of dystopian alternate universe where nothing makes any sense. What rubbish! The Austrian Empire was just like most countries in Europe at the time: "despotism tempered by incompetence". Getting accused of some vague sort of misbehavior that doesn't really have a name was as ordinary as dishwater in those days, and I doubt that it has changed that much. If it has, sue me. I'm dead and don't have any money anyway.
An article in the 'Onion' recently claimed that Kafka Airport in Prague was voted Most Alienated Airport. Good One, har, har. Now, every twist and turn beyond the ordinary is Kafka-ish in one form or another. Hell, I've seen it in the damn sports pages. I know how this works--you're getting ready to turn on me, aren't you? O.K. fine--you won't have Franz Kafka to kick around any more.
Causes David Beemer Supports
Wife works as an advocate for Seniors. Sponser a child through World Vision