
We Americans love to ask what others do for a living. I first noticed this while living abroad when people didn't ask me this question. Upon meeting someone for the first time, they would more likely inquire about my interests and passions rather than what I did for a living. I think that is when I first began thinking outside of this box.
The question, "What do you do?" seems horribly confining to me. I can imagine my father replying, "I'm an accountant." But as I play many roles in life, I can't imagine being reduced to a single answer that defines what I do. I'm an entrepreneur, marketer, father, spiritual teacher, coach, blogger, thinker, tinkerer, lover, son, believer and writer.
Oh you meant, "What do I do to make money?"
I've never been really good at answering that question as is evident by my family's inability to describe what I do for a living. To my inlaws, I'm in computers. To my friends, I'm professionally unemployed which is a cute way to describe being a marketing consultant. And despite my wife being highly intelligent, if you asked her this question she would stumble to provide an answer that accurately describes what I do for a living. All in all, your description of what I do has more to do with how you see me than it does with what I actually do.
And, like you, the answer I want to give is, "I'm a writer." But my lifestyle hardly evokes the imagery we all come up with when we envision being a writer. Yes, I've written and published a book. And people I don't know have actually purchased and presumably read my book. But while this technically establishes me as a writer, my accountant Father would be hard pressed to enter this into the occupation field on my tax return.
Very few people seem to like their jobs and something about this negativity towards work makes avoid checking the writer box in the occupation field. It seems to me that the creative expression of writing smacks in the face of working for a living. Somehow the dream of writing for a living never seems to include deadlines, writers block, self promotion, editing, and pandering for reviews. The chasm between my passion and my job is wide and I'm not sure I want to cross it.
So, for now, I'm just going to agree with my inlaws that I'm in computers. When they start saying He's a writer, then I'll start checking that box on my tax return. Until then, writing is my passion rather than my job and I think I like it that way.
Darwin Stephenson
Inspiration Divine
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My Work blog
For 35 years I defined myself as a teacher. I lived and breathed the classroom, my students, my lessons. There wasn’t room for much else. I was passionate about learning and loved teaching. But the “work” of record keeping, grading, and increasing responsibilities that have come since “no child left behind” left me exhausted and drained. And then about eight years ago, I began to write children books. Until that point written expression was a serious effort for me. I stressed over writing papers in courses. I felt frustrated when conferencing with children to help them express themselves more clearly. But now, writing became a joy, a new passion. Was this a way to ease me into retirement? I feared losing what defined me. Was “author” a new title I could slip into? I felt blessed when my first book, Where Am I Sleeping Tonight?-A Story of Divorce was published a year before my retirement. I had a new way to communicate with children.....another job that I wasn’t in for the money. Which is a pretty cool way to feel about your work.
I structure my “non-working” day writing when I feel like it. No more bells or planning sheets organizing my time . I’m “working” on many other stories and submitting them with the same perseverance I displayed towards kids who didn’t complete their assignments. Children stayed in at recess, sat next to me on a bus to a field trip completing assignments, whatever it took to get missed work done. I was tenacious. And I apply “it’s the squeaky wheel that gets the grease” attitude in my submissions and promotional efforts as well.
I’ve just started supervising student teachers at a local college, so I can spread my educational philosophy to others. And, as I observe them teaching in classrooms, I’ll get more fodder for my stories. A win/win situation. When it comes down to it, I’m grateful to call what I’ve done with my life a calling, rather than “work”.
A Calling
Isn't that the best? When what we spend our days doing is aligned with our purpose. We all should aspire to find this balance in our lives. Thanks for sharing Carol. - darwin
One's Identity is one's job. . . unfortunately
Hi Darwin,
Americans are so into identifying themselves by their job. Identifying oneself by one's occupation seems to foreclose a lot of other questions which may require thought. I am a teacher; I am a policeman, or I am a doctor. Those things tell me nothing of significance about the individual. Go to any cocktail party or social gathering where you are not known you will be asked "What do you do?" They really don't want you to tell them about yourself: what you believe, what you hold dear to your heart, or that you are a spiritual being. How many people do you know who, when they retired, lost their 'identity' and wandered aimlessly from day to day. . . fish out of water so to speak?