Have you ever had a dream? Have you every wanted something so much that you exhausted yourself in the pursuit of it only to find that your efforts are in vain? Bleak I know. I'm trying not to be that person, I'm trying to be positive...look on the bright side, etc. But damn I'm exhausted and with little to show for my efforts!
Remember when you were a kid and everything came effortlessly. You were invincible. You WERE going to be that sports star, rock star, best selling author, whatever. No matter what came along you'd conquer it. When do we lose that? I've tried not to. Been through a whole bunch of shit along the way that I'd rather not get into and I've continued to get up and go forward. Lately there's been alot of changes. Changes in the writing world, in the real world, all over. It has forced me to reevaluate what I'm doing with life.
I'll admit right now: It has become joyless.
That's so not good! Life is too short for all the stress. Somewhere along the lines it became about being this success instead of creating the product for the fun of it. Remember that word, fun? I'm sure some of you can relate. To borrow a line from Tony Robbins: "We get caught up making a living instead of designing life."
Then one day you wake up and your fifty and you wonder what the hell happened. Where did that wrong turn come in?
It's ok though. Once you're off that path you can always choose to get back on...OR choose a new one.
This is the theme of my recent book Demon Hunter: Heroes Call. Costa is back as the demon hunter but when we revisit him he is living a quiet life with his wife and expecting their first child. When Costa is called back into action he is thrilled for the excitement of it. Because who among us doesn't lust for that adventure? Be honest. The problem is that this time things go very, very wrong and Costa is forced to choose to fight for the life he once knew or take a new path and start over fresh.
What would you do?
I suppose it depends where you are in your life before you make your decisions.
"It is in your moments of decision that your destiny is shaped." - Tony Robbins
What am I going to do? Well that's easy enough said: I'm going to rediscover my passion. Find my smile again. And LIVE dammit. There is alot of fun to be had in this world. Time in the hour glass is running out faster than I care to admit and I'm not going to spend it with worry, hate, resentment, or especially FEAR. I choose the path less traveled.
Let all thoughts and decisions come from your heart. Your head is overworked.
Rediscover your joy.
Some of my favorite things in life including martial arts; walking in nature; travel; and beautiful music. When all felt lost in the world an angel came on TV and sang her beautiful little heart out. (I'm talking about Jackie Evancho!)
And when all I wanted to do was curl up in bed and eat Cheetos I came across another courageous young girl: Bethany Hamilton. The movie version of her life, Soul Surfer, is nothing compared to the young lady herself. She is my new hero ( though I'm sure she would never accept such status)
The girl loses her arm to a shark attack and looks upon it as a blessing! Some of us have it all and we bitch and moan anyway.
How can you hear singing like Jackie or witness moments like Bethany in the beauty of the Hawaiian islands and not believe in more?
It is enough for me. My blinders are coming off. At first it feels a bit odd but I tell you I liken it to writing without an outline. Once the structure is off your back and your whole world isn't outlined in a day planner or on your iPhone, etc. then it feels like a huge weight is off your back. Be spontaneous, be adventurous, be unafraid. These are the characters I write about, it is time I embrace this path myself.
Causes Cynthia Vespia Supports
American Cancer Society
World Wildlife Fund