I have a toothbrush in order to brush my teeth. Toothbrushes are designed for brushing teeth.
I have a food mixer in order to blend my soup. Food mixers are designed for blending food.
I have a kettle in order to heat my water. Kettles are designed for heating water.
I have a gun in order to regulate my government and preserve life. Guns are designed for putting holes in people and other animals so that they die.
Hang on. There’s something wrong here. This suggests that guns kill people. Guns don’t kill people. People kill people. Ah! That’s better.
Toothbrushes don’t brush teeth, food mixers don’t blend food, and kettles don’t heat water.
I have a brain in order to . . . actually, I’m not quite sure why I’ve got a brain. Come to that, I’m none too sure I do have a brain.
Some people serve no purpose other than turning perfectly good food into ordure.
That’s it, that’s why I’ve got a brain, in order to conceal from myself the utter vacuity, futility, stupidity, inanity, and all round undesirability of my miserable and deeply lamentable existence. I think that’s why I’ve got a gun, too.
Every tool has its purpose no matter how paltry the purpose - or the tool.
Given the scale of the job with which it is confronted, I must have a very big and very acrobatic brain. Thanks to my very big and very acrobatic brain, I can live in a simplified world of fear, falsehood, and an imbecilic conviction of my own rectitude and virtue.
Causes Charles Davis Supports
Oxfam, Amnesty International, Greenpeace