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Healing Closed Hearts

Healing Closed Hearts

There were times in my life when I felt cut off from one person or another, and I didn’t understand why it hurt so much until later in my life. I have found that cutting anyone off, whether it means ignoring a phone call or being distant when someone is trying to communicate, might have serious consequences later on. Most of us feel hurt if someone avoids us or leaves us, and it’s as though something is being taken from us, which sometimes leaves us feeling broken. And no matter how much we may dislike what another person says or does, we still may feel pain when separating from them. I’m not sure which is worse: feeling uncomfortable about hurting someone even if it’s justified, or feeling lifeless because of what someone has done to us.


              When we encounter difficult people in our lives, especially those who return from the past, we can’t be certain why they are back. But no matter the reason, their reappearance can be an opportunity for communion and healing the past. This does not mean that we must open ourselves up to being treated badly, but by dealing with a past problem relationship, we can strengthen our resistance and avoid attracting similar future encounters that may be even more difficult. Choosing to deal with these troublesome people from our past prepares us to understand them, and when we try to reach out to someone else, or when we ourselves are trying to reach out to God, we become more open to hearing and understanding.


              By contrast, whenever we separate from someone, even for our own valid reasons, we tend to weaken ourselves. This is most likely the real reason it can feel wrong to detach from anyone: it’s because we aren’t able to see that in reality, we are all connected, and that the true meaning or purpose, from the beginning of the relationship, is always a holier one than we might know.


We gain each time we treat anyone with the highest regard, and we lose whenever we decide someone is not good enough for us. Regardless of who they are, or whatever they may have done to us or to anyone else, if they are trying to reconnect with us, we may be their only chance for the hope that we each would like to find in God, who always listens and responds. It is by reaching out to someone else, no matter who they are or what they’ve done, that both sides are able to rise higher. But when we close the door or ignore the call, we are also closing the door on our own call to God. That’s because every relationship is an opportunity to be a gift for the people involved. So, if we are feeling despair in our lives, and think that God does not hear us, then we need to examine our own actions to find how we may have closed our hearts to someone else.


 Catherine Nagle ~ Imprinted Wisdom