Brother EDEN Douglas chronicles his journey of Self-Discovery in this very detailed examination of his faith, sexuality and calling.
Brother gives an overview of the book:
Today, once again, I'm a follower of Jesus Christ..., a CHRISTian in word and deed.
MY journey back took a little while, I must confess. I strayed onto another path for a season mostly in search of love and acceptance. I felt betrayed by the faith of my youth, especially as I matured and discovered my ability to love, indiscriminately. I've since discovered that being a Christian was to become like Christ which meant I had to 're-discover' exactly who Jesus was, and surprisingly, I found out He wasn't my youthful definition or persona! I further discovered after intense study, HIS LOVE and ACCEPTANCE of me, just as I was, which seem to contradict all that I'd been led to believe was Truth. As my eyes and heart opened to HIS LOVE, my harden resolve to go my own way began to melt. I'd seen (and experienced) far too much done in the name of Jesus, that now, in review after really studying JESUS, I learned He hadn't done or said most of what is attributed to Him, ...especially those things that didn't reveal HIS LOVE and COMPASSION. It is often His zealous followers whose words we cling to and quote and that regretfully, at times, contradict the true person and purpose of Christ.
IF you can accept that Christ came to fulfill the Law presented to Moses and be the perfect sacrifice for all eternity, and all sin, before and after His Death, Burial and Resurrection...then, shouldn't we also live according to HIS TEACHINGS, EXAMPLE and NATURE??? I had truly desired to be pleasing in HIS SIGHT and live a life of dedicated service, but I had a burning question that neither friends, family nor my youthful faith seem to ever adequately answer.
What did Jesus actually say about same-sex spiritual love relationships, or homosexuality, for the lack of a better word? And, more importantly, could I be Christian and homosexual? Was there a place of service in the Kingdom for me, being such a man?
The only teachings I'd discovered on this subject continued to be everyone else's words, BUT HIS. There was not even one reference in the words of the other prophets attributing any statement to Jesus, the Christ, on the subject of same sex relationships. No second hand storieor parables. Nada. On this subject, Jesus appeared to be silent, or possibly His Words have been omitted from the original translations.
Of that, we may never know.