Updated 9-15: I'm sure many of you have seen this: http://www.expressionsofspirit.com/symptoms.htm
A lot of my friends have that or something very like it hanging in a very nice decorative frame upon the wall of their abode, often above the commode.
I can tell you from personal experience, its all utter shite (perhaps that's why they put it above the commode?). By the time you reach the state of mind described in that document you are already at peace and as I've said before I only know one person that I know for sure has reached that state of mind. All the rest are like me, faking it to the best of their ability.
So lets talk about something more pragmatic. Signs of Intruding Awareness. Perhaps you prefer the phrase: Signs of Impending Consciousness. There is one other way to say it: Krishna is coming, but that might turn off the Christians, so let me also put it this way: Christ is coming.
- Every moment of every day is utter agony and you don't know why.
- Half the time you want to find a tall structure to leap off. The other half the time you want to curl into a ball and let yourself die.
- You react to everything that happens around you.
- You can't stand at least one person who you see much too often.
- You're irritable and you're tired of trying to find a reason why and sick of explaining why to those who care.
- You have a very serious addiction to something.
- People keep asking you why you're so depressed.
- You feel a desperate need within yourself but can't begin to understand what it is and when you think about it, you feel completely and totally insane.
- When people talk to you everything turns to an argument.
- You feel a strong need to tell others how to live their lives.
- You feel the only way you can have peace is to control your environment.
- You vacilate from one mood to its opposite and back again. Over and Over, ad infinitum and are aware of it but unable to do anything about it. The mood swings make you feel crazy but the craziness just makes it worse.
- You feel you are on a downward spiral and long for it to hit bottom, but there seems to be no bottom in sight.
The list goes on and on, but you get the general idea.
There's this beautiful story from Hinduism about Vishnu. This story is a perfect analogy of the point of this article.
In the second of Vishnu's many lives he incarnated as a Turtle named Koorma floating in a sea of milk. He incarnated there for a very specific purpose. He permitted a pole to be placed vertically in the center groove of his back. Around that pole was wrapped a giant reptile called Vasuki. A group of demons grabbed one side of the serpent, and a group of gods grabbed the other. The demons pulled one way then the the gods pulled the other, causing the pole to churn the milk which held Vishnu.
Do you have that image in your head? Big sea turtle (think the size of a house, or even bigger, perhaps Gamara size) with a pole slotted into his back. Wrapped around this pole three times is a serpent, a really big green one, perhaps the length of a football field. The gods, giants in their own right, have grabbed his head and the demons, perfect matches for their god counterparts have grabbed his tail. The demons start by pulling until the pole spins thirteen times counter clockwise. Next the gods pull until the pole has spun thirteen times clockwise. Then they repeat the cycle.
Why do they do this?
Well. It turns out that Brahma let out a little secret. He told his son that there are valuable treasures in the milk and then his son let the story seep to one of the gods. The gods realized that alone they would not be able to get the treasure, but if they enlisted the help of their mortal enemies, the demons and got Vishnu and Vasuki's help they might be able to do it.
Eventually, after much churning the milk began to change and at various points many things came out of the milk. I'll let you do your own research on the details. I really don't care about the details at this point. The most important thing to come from the milk, in my opinion, is Lakshmi. She is divine awareness.
The milk represents free consciousness. Vishnu, he's the foundation of the universe. Vasuki is a snake, what do you suppose he represents? The pole is a lever: it could be any thing and is in fact every thing. The demons represent the unhealthy qualities of self and the gods represent the healthy qualities of self. The vessel in which all this occurs is the universe, our personal universe, the universe of the individual human.
The churning motion occurs when we realize that the healthy and unhealthy parts of ourselves are at odds and we begin to try to choose the healthy gods and we slip and the demons pull back. When we are at odds within, the churning occurs.
If the demons and gods don't churn the milk of consciousness, nothing good will come out of it. Another way to think of it is: Lakshmi can only come to us if the milk is churned.
So all the signs I listed above are just symptoms of that churning. We want to be aware and we fear it so we throw ourselves into our addictions, fears and other unhealthy attitudes. But then the gods pull back and we see how things are and we want to change and grow and be healthy. But then the demons pull back and we fall hard and bruise our egos and skin our knees and hurt those we love. But then we repent and we're sincerely sorry and we want to grow and change and the gods pull back and over and over and over we go through this cycle, until Lakshmi arrives. Then the demons and Gods fight over her and the other spoils. The gods always win. The universe is stacked in their favor.
My point is simple: all this machination of our minds and bodies is part of the process of waking up. This is the primary way that we become aware of awareness. There are other methods, but they involve fantastic boons granted to us by the watchmaker. They are rare and wonderful.
So if you feel at odds with yourself, relax. All it means is: Christ is coming. He's arriving as the king of kings, within yourself, to you personally and without any need of guidance from any religious figures.
Causes Brian McKee Supports
I support the cause of peace via peaceful means.