
When I think of the word kismet it brings to mind destiny – something that is completely out of my control and something that is bigger than me. I am not saying that I don’t have a modicum of control over my own destiny – I do. But I am a true believer in everything happens for a reason and there is no such thing as a coincidence. It does not really matter which side of the road I choose, ether way I will end up at the same point in the end. Now I realize that might sound fairly odd to most people; but I really stopped caring a while ago about that. I now try very hard to be grounded and make logical, sound decisions to make the journey I take the smoothest. I have certainly had my share of bruising along the way and I would prefer the second half of my life be a bit less colorful. I never imagined I would be entering the second portion single. I always pictured myself as part of a pair, someone beside me to share everything with. Obviously that was not to be. Perhaps my greatest love was my first love and there will never be another like him. I need to accept that and allow myself to move forward - - alone.
Now this might sound a lot like a cop out to many, but if in the grand scheme of things I tally all the 'single' years against all the 'non-single' years - the singles are coming in at a resounding 88% vs. non-single at a paltry 12% - I'd say I have mastered the art of singleness - wouldn't you? Hmmm....I'm sure there's a novel in there somewhere......
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destiny
Brenda,
I,too believe in destiny.sometimes someone comes into your life at a totally unexpected time,and knocks you off your feet,and can be complilcated if you are already 43 years married.
This happened to me less than a year ago,but he and I made a choice to stay where we were,not without much pain and anguish,in the name of honor and committment.
He still dwells in my heart and soul,and always will,but I live with the choice I made(with him directing it),and some days are hell and some days are ok,but i know this.He was my soulmate. And we never met in person!
Thank you for an insightful piece.
kindred souls
Brenda Youngerman
Heather,
I fear there are many more than you and I who have those mates we shall never see again....but perhaps the beauty of what could have been is better than nothing....
I once heard someone say that it was possible to have a soul mate for different portions of your life - not sure I buy that one.