It's not easy to rid your heart of pain and bitterness. Sometimes it takes years to overcome the similitudes of the distress you experienced. Scars cannot be washed away; they must be healed. Deciding to forgive is the first step towards healing. Healing however, first takes place on the inside of us, before it becomes apparent to yourself and others. The state and conditions of our hearts and minds cannot be healed by psychological methods such as, astrology, theories, or cosmic karma, or by physical hands. To eradicate the pain, bitterness and unhappiness in our hearts, we need Divine intervention. It is a spiritual process. It can only be performed by the one who created us.
An unforgiving heart breeds contention and strife. They are like seeds, taking root within us, and will grow like weeds, consuming our heart with envy and bitterness, and the desire to make that person or persons pay for how they made us feel. However, keep in mind, that with this attitude, you are paying as well. You are the one who is carrying the burden of this bitterness. You are the one losing sleep at night, taking tranquilizers, drinking, and being stressed out over something that happened in the past. The past is anything that has already happened; whether it be a minute ago or 20 years ago. The page has already turned. Another chapter has begun. You are holding up yourself from enjoying your own life, smelling the roses, and having a peace of mind, all because you just cannot let it go.
The trials of life will give us perspectives. Instead of you trying to get justice or revenge because a life situation did not turn out like you expected, you need to just “Forgive”. Forgiving means to pardon that person; and to cease feeling resentment against someone. It is an act of humility that you cannot accomplish alone. You must be sincere and honest with yourself, and ask our Heavenly Father to remove the feelings of resentment and blame in your heart against this person(s). You must surrender, and be patient. Yield it freely, to the only power there is, which is our Heavenly Father. In Him, is the only Divine intervention we will ever receive. Everything is a sacrifice; this is what life is all about.
Let's look at the big picture. Our heavenly father was crucified for being a good man, and he forgave the entire world, because He is forgiveness itself. His pain and sufferings superseded anything we can ever imagine. If He is Forgiveness itself, then it is Him in US that will extend the grace. In short, Forgiveness is extending grace to the person who has wronged us, rather than demanding payment. Revenge is not ours.
Forgiveness is like a soothing balm, designed to heal our pain, liberating our hearts and minds from emotional stress and torment, allowing us to breathe, and be free. You must be willing to forgive someone, even yourself. Only then, can we look the person in the eyes and say, "I Forgive You", and mean it. It's a wonderful, liberated feeling!