Of course I don't know what it is like to be schizophrenic. I could never claim that I even begin to understand the states of mind that accompany such a fascinating yet disturbing condition.
However, last night I had a dream that brought me to a crossroads. Do dreams represent an 'unconscious' and generally nonrealistic form of schizophrenia? And do realistic dreams that remain lucid long after the fact parallel schizophrenia even more closely?
A dream is a different reality that your mind enters into when you are asleep (to simplify the matter). Is schizophrenia not a different perception of reality while awake? Is the difference between a dream and schizophrenia the state of consciousness in which each occur? If we could somehow tap into our unconscious minds and somehow truly understand the process behind dreaming could we also maybe understand better the world of conscious schizophrenia?
If schizophrenia is altered reality, this brings up another concept. We all have different world views, different perceptions of how things really are. Maybe some of the people who are diagnosed with schizophrenia are just experiencing a more extreme form of worldly perception. Maybe such people are more in tune with their own minds and surroundings.
The dream I had last night was so contradictiory though...in the dream I KNEW that I was schizophrenic. How is that possible? If I have no idea what it is like to be schizophrenic, how can I have a dream in which I am experiencing situations that my minds tells me are schizophrenic??? I am still completely blown away by this concept. In the dream, I was thrown back and forth between three different realities. I had no idea which one was the right one or the real one. Just like I knew I existed, I knew I was schizophrenic. In that way, the schizophrenia I experienced was completely existential...is that how conscious schizophrenic people experience it? Or is every single person's mind so different that I can't even begin to wrap my own mind around it...