Step right up for a new chapter of Hummingbird which I think is going to be a novella, not a short story. Click this link to go to my page on www.redroom.com and click Hummingbird 2: http://www.redroom.com/member-articles-stories/Blonditude
It's getting more complex by the minute as noir's often do. My characters take over and push the narrative in different directions - always. Very domineering, my characters, never a wish-washy one in the bunch. Exciting new developments include the return of Lenny the Leper and a big reveal into the personality of Harry Wade, the missing retired federal prosecuter.
I re-worked the scene at the Wade house quite a bit. The biggest challenge is maintaining the main characters voice, McElroy, a private detective, as he is the narrator. There is a tendancy for me to get over-describey about surroundings and scenery and to deliver stilted dialog when trying to set up a story arc. I trytoforceitintoalittleboxwhich NEVER works - there's no flow and the arc gets constipated - pardon my French, but it's exactly like that. I mean, this is a guy's, guy - he's never gonna think "conversational grouping". That's still in there until i can break out of that particular prison.
Control is not my friend.
When I'm dialoging between characters and let them riff, words shoot through my fingers and jump on the page. I can see them talking, practically smell the room and hear the background noises...IT'S ALIVE (ACK!). The scene between McElroy and Lenny was like that. I knew exactly what needed to happen and it was completely easy to keep both of them locked securely in character and I WASN"T TRYING. They just were. It's like it's being dictated to me.
On another subject, Del Potro beat Roddick in the second semi in Montreal today. Dammit, Andy! It's one or two points either way. I know you're playing your absolute best out there but in the Big Game - nothing can slip, not even one shitty volley. Roger lost yesterday because of two loose points up 5-1 in the third. Crap! Oh well, I'm rooting for Murray in the final. Del Potro's face is too long - he's even uglier than Murray.