My little friend Rhee had a totally different life. She was my high school friend's daughter. I had taken my friend to the Hare Krishna temple one weekend and she joined...just like that. She and her husband had already had Rhee, she was about 1. They moved into the temple and began living a very strict Vaishnava lifestyle. I thought they carried it too far but that is what they wanted and seemed happy. Soon they moved to a remote temple in the northeast and I had infrequent contact with them until they moved back to Dallas in 2002. They had been living in Florida and Rhee had fallen pregnant. Unmarried and only 14, she was a disgrace to her family in the community they were living in and they moved back to Dallas to escape the whispers and gossip. Rhee's daughter was born in March of 2002, and at my urging her parents enrolled her in public school for the first time in her life. She was very naive, and when her school gave her a computer to catch up on class work she missed while pregnant, I offered to let her on my AOL account so she would have internet access. She joined a teen mom support group and met K***** in July of 2003.

K***** was far away, in Massachusettes, but to Rhee it wouldn't have mattered if she was next door. Rhee wasn't allowed to leave the house except for school, it was expected of her to take care of her own child. The only social life she had was online. She and K***** became friends while K****** was in her final months of pregnancy with Jayden. K****** confided in her the problems she was having with her baby's father. He apparently had not wanted children, he already had one daughter with another woman and he couldn't afford her. K***** let her teen mom group in on a little secret that she had been hiding from Jayden's father, Manny. He had been paying for her to take the Depo shot, driving her to the clinic, and then waiting in the outer office while she went in to get the injection. What he didn't know, she posted conspiritorally to her online friends, was that she had been refusing the shot in the office, and then lying to him and telling him she got it, in the hopes that she would become pregnant and that he would marry her! Unfortunately for her, the plan backfired when they broke up, and then she called him back a month later to let him know she was pregnant. At first Manny didn't believe the child was his. He took responsibility and resumed his relationshonship with K*****. Constant fighting plagued what should have been a happy time for the pair. Manny felt trapped and became more and more resentful as time when on. K****** complained to her online buddies and spoke of moving into her own apartment when she was approved for government housing. They were living with Manny's mother, with K***** stormimg home to her father every few weeks. Manny never asked her to come back, but she always cried to his mother, who let her move back in.

K****** dissapeared from the group at the end of her pregnancy. She had been admitted to the hospital in Boston when she was complaining of premature labor. The nurses found no evidence of this, but due to the mother to be's fragile mental state, they kept her for a few weeks. She was discharged and Jayden was born full term a few weeks later.

Manny and K***** brought Jayden home to Manny's mother's home, where K*****proceeded to lie around and complain of being sick, while Manny's mother took care of Jayden alternating with Manny.

Manny's mother made excuse for her and Manny grew weary of her. She started spending more time at her dad's, where she had internet access and a sister nearby that would care for the baby for her. She had been at her father's for a few days when I had the pleasure of making her aquaintence. By the time Jayden was 2 months old, Manny and K***** had broken up for the final time.

I was also enjoying a cyber social life. I had a few friends around the country that I had met on different message boards and I was regularly instant messaging with them in the evenings. It never ceased to amaze me how quickly you can become friends with people you most likely will never meet thru a chat room or message board. Playing games was also a passion of mine. I became hooked on MahJong and other word games. I kept tabs on Rhee thru instant message and visited her mom often. I was still close to her mom, even tho I didnt agree with her lifestyle, she had nine kids by that time and wasnt showing any signs of slowing down!

I was active at the Hare Krishna temple. I taught a Sunday School class and enjoyed the spiritual life that I was cultivating for myself. I had not taken initiation, and had no intentions to. I was developing my relationship with God and as my adopted temple dad said, I was being as spiritual in this lifetime as I was going to be. I had joined an online Hare Krishna women's group and took part in lively discussions on God, spirituality, family, women's roles and Indian lifestyle. It was here I first heard of Shiva Ratri.