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Madagascar Man | Madagascar Man

ericka-lutz's picture
Dec.29.2009
A year ago today, my husband died. My Bill, the man I'd been with for over 22 years, the man who fathered my child and knew me better than anybody on the planet suddenly, unexpectedly, mysteriously, in a strange place, died.  Died! It turned me upside down and tore me inside out. What a year it's...
ericka-lutz's picture
Dec.24.2009
We're in the thick of it now, the days that, a year ago, were the final days we had together in Madagascar: Hard days. Loving days. Memorable and painful days. We're doing Christmas as close to the way we used to as we can, Annie and I, missing the most important element of all, the one person who...
ericka-lutz's picture
Mar.18.2009
On Sunday, March 15th, the Haas School of Business and the Beahrs Environmental Leadership Program at UC Berkeley hosted a memorial for my husband, Bill Sonnenschein. About 300 people attended. I spoke, along with colleagues, students, friends, and other family members. Here's a transcript of my...
ericka-lutz's picture
Feb.28.2009
You know those stupid bumper stickers on the back of delivery trucks, "How am I driving?" Well, I know a number of you are wondering some version of that for me: "How's Ericka doing?"   So here's a brief progress report on me. Two months after Bill's death, and Annie, I, and the...
ericka-lutz's picture
Feb.16.2009
I haven’t had a parent die, or a child, I can’t compare – each an equal ripping, I imagine. You don’t measure grief against grief. But a partner-in-life you walk beside. That’s what you do.  A roll of paper towels on the sunroom table, the plastic half ripped off. When did I fetch it? Begin to...
ericka-lutz's picture
Jan.24.2009
(A.K.A. the World's Saddest Meme.) The ever-awesome Gina Hyams not only tagged me for this "random things" meme, but suggested this variation specifically for me. It's been over three weeks since my husband died. I watched him die. I kissed him goodbye. I buried him. And I still don't...
ericka-lutz's picture
Jan.06.2009
Thank you for all your notes and calls, my friends. Each time I receive an email or Facebook wall posting, my iPhone dings and I check. I cannot write back right now, but each message is an infusion of love and support. You are keeping me going. New grief is an odd thing, I'm learning. Sometimes I...